Post # 1
I had my first dress fitting on Saturday and while i was on the pedestal, my mom was talking to me about getting a bustle done since i was hiring a photographer. I told her the prices she thought were so high, were actually considered cheap. She gave me a doubtful look, so i turned to the bride on the next pedestal (i did not know her) and asked her how much she paid for her photographer. She just gives me this weird look, then literally sneered at me and and told me she paid a thousand.
Her reaction kind of startled me, because to me it was just a simple question. Was i rude to ask her that, or was she just snobby?
Post # 3
@MrsWinTraining2014: Hmm…maybe a little bit of both. Money is a touchy subject for some reason to a lot of people. I had an acquaintance ask me what my dress cose (she just got married last month) but prefaced it with, “If you don’t mind my asking…”
I’m not one to care and I’m always one for a deal (I was proud to tell her the steal I got my dress at!) so it really depends on the person/situation.
Post # 4
- Wedding: October 2011 - Bed & Breakfast
Asking a total stranger about money is risky. Most people do not feel comfortable discussing that sort of thing in mixed company. The sneering? Probably uncalled for. But maybe photography was a sensitive subject for her, or she was having a bad day or something. 5 of us got married within a 2 year span of time. You bet that, as close girlfriends, we talked about vendor pricing. But would we talk about it with a stranger in a face-to-face conversation? Probably not.
Post # 5
In a situation like that, I would have told someone no problem. I don’t think it’s rude. If it were not a fellow bride, then I would have thought it was rude.
Post # 6
See I got a deal for my 2k photographer so I wouldn’t mind. My friend paid 7k. His wife would be uncomfortable to answer that to a stranger.
Post # 7
Thanks. i thought maybe i offended her or something.
Post # 8
Asking your best friend? That’s probably okay. Taking a stranger by surprise at a dress fitting? Not what I would recommend. I was not comfortable discussing what I spent on my wedding.
Post # 9
@MrsWinTraining2014: That was not really an appropriate question to ask a total stranger.
That said, it’s done, move on, live and learn. 🙂
Post # 10
@MrsWinTraining2014: Personally, stranger or friend, I wouldn’t care to share how much I spent on my vendors becase I got such great deals on everything I would want to share in hopes that I might be helpful to someone.
But there are some people who are just not that comfortable sharing that infor for reasons I don’t know.
Post # 11
Knowing that you were ANOTHER bride I personally would not have been offended at all because I would love to help others in the area to ensure they are getting the best “deal” and vice cersa. A couple of friends and I are married and if we are really in a stump with something we ask with preluding “if you don;t mind me asking…” But at the same time thats me maybe some brides are not as open or feel like a wedding is a “competition”
I think it would be a little weird of a non-bride to ask because I would feel like it was more “judging” rather than natural curiousity…. or who knows maybe they are curious.
I remember one time I slipped and asked another bride the carat size because I was natural curious and halfwy it coming out of my mouth I was like “oh NO I shouldn’t have”. Don’t worry you won’t ever see her again.
Post # 12
Honestly, yes you would have offended me, sorry. 🙁 Not so much that I would have sneered at you, but I would have felt very uncomfortable. I don’t even talk money with my friends, let alone total strangers.
Post # 13
@MrsWinTraining2014: It is generally considered inappropriate to ask strangers any questions related to money.
Post # 14
I think it’s rude to ask a stranger, but not so much to inquire with recently married friends. I don’t think I’d ever have the guts to ask a complete stranger point-blank how much they paid for anything.
Post # 15
Asking a stranger is a bit much, but if it was an acquaintance I would ask without hesitation.
Post # 16
I think it’s less to do with money, and more to do with the fact she probably didn’t want to be involved in the awkward fight/confrontation you seemed to be having with your mother. No one wants to be the middle man, or the person that decides an argument – if your friend/sister/dad had been there, they probably wouldn’t have wanted to make a judgement about what was expensive or not, because of how the person they were disagreeing with might react.