(Closed) Is it rude to ask people the size of their ring?

posted 5 years ago in Rings
Post # 46
Member
3302 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

I’ve been asked this several times in person. I would never ask someone else. Ever.

Post # 47
Member
174 posts
Blushing bee

Maybe I’m weird but I would love it if someone asked me about my ring. The only person who has asked about it was my Aunt and we discussed specs (hers is a 1 carat round brilliant D color, mine is 1.7 cushion warmer stone…somewhere between H-J.) I would love to chit chat about diamonds with people in real life but unfortunatelt it’s a faux pas. Bummer that my interest in diamonds is limited to the bee. oh well 🙂 

Post # 48
Member
9443 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper

I don’t see how it’s really all that rude – you don’t HAVE to answer! They are free to ask and you are free to not tell them.

The comparison to asking how much your house cost is a bit silly since the amount you paid AND the amount your mortgaged is public record in the US. I think wearing a huge ring is more like a tattoo – you know it’s going to get attention so if you don’t want comments don’t show it off! 

Post # 49
Member
924 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2016

I dont think its a big deal if its a family member or close friend who is just curious… Everyone seems to take offense to everything nowadays. 

Post # 50
Member
4035 posts
Honey bee

I haven’t read the other answers, but I think it’s rude to ask the size of anything. Or the price.

Post # 52
Member
174 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: October 2015 - Loft in the city

RUDE! RUDE! RUDE! 

and that last comment “is that a half ct” was total shade 💩💩💩 

Post # 53
Member
1098 posts
Bumble bee

without reading any of the other comments I’d have to say it all depends on the context. someone asking for informational reasons like they’re ring shopping/browsing themselves or like here on the bee then no I dont think it’s rude. in any other context or reason then yeah that’s rude as F lol

Post # 54
Member
1961 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: April 2018

I might ask since I am waiting, and if I see something that fits my vision I would like to know. But I would ask politly. “Do you mind if I ask you the size, as it’s stunning!” type of thing. I wouldn’t be upset if they didn’t want to tell me. 

Post # 55
Member
89 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: October 2017 - Insignia Steakhouse

View original reply
weddingdiva2016:  if you have to ask yourself if something is rude, it’s rude. 

Post # 56
Member
249 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: December 2013

I think it’s rude. The only comment I’ve ever made on a ring is ‘it’s lovely and congrats!’

Post # 57
Member
223 posts
Helper bee

I would never ask other people but that’s just my nature.

I don’t mind when people ask me the specs of my ring. I’m happy with what Fiance gave me (1.02 ct FL) so I don’t withhold. Some people are genuinely curious so I share. I even recommend my jeweller to them. 

What I give the side eye is when people make conclusions from the ring specs. One girl at the office even made suggestions about our sex life based on how big the rock is. 

Post # 58
Member
9384 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: July 2016

I generally dislike that question.. it’s so.. competetive.  There are exceptions of course.

I excuse it if I know the person is shopping for/expecting a ring soon.  Biggest compliment I got was when a guy I’d met at a conference (his now-fiancee was there too) texted me almost half a year later that his (then girlfriend) loved my ring and he was wondering if I could tell him about it and maybe send a photo so he knew what to shop for, as he wanted to propose to her soon.  THAT was a situation where it was totally appropriate to ask about the ring specs, I felt.

At a different conference, a girl grabbed my hand, exclaimed she loved my ring, and then said her ring looked a lot like it (she is now divorced), but hers was definitely bigger and how big was mine exactly?  THAT rubbed me the wrong way.

Post # 59
Member
133 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: July 2017

As other PPs have said, if someone is asking because they are ring shopping and genuinely want to know, then I think it’s fine. In my experience, these people usually prime their question with “if you don’t mind me asking….” Or “do you mind telling me….”. 

Otherwise, not only is it rude but kind of pointless. Like if it’s not as big as the asker thinks it “should” be, what am I going to do, take my ring back and exchange it? “Yes Mr. Jeweller, I was perfectly happy with my ring , but then some random person implied it wasn’t big enough, so now I need to fix it”. Sounds like a losing battle to me. 

Post # 60
Member
100 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: November 2015

I hate when people do that… First would be “how big is it?” Follow up with “how much was it?” And some judgy girls would be like “Why do you want a diamond anyways? Diamonds are useless.” Or “Awww it’s nice but I’m so not getting married this young.” Huh?? Why is that even relevant? I have no idea how to respond to that…

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