(Closed) Is it rude to get married on someone birthday?

posted 7 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
Member
660 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

I would say no… it’s always going to be SOMEONE’s birthday, anniversary, engagement date, etc. etc. We were married 2 days after my stepson’s birthday… only 365 to choose from. Just me though!

Post # 4
Member
2190 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2011

Mmm…yeah, kind of. I wouldn’t say it’s rude but would you want him to miss out on his birthday just so he had to attend your wedding??

Post # 5
Member
2385 posts
Buzzing bee

I have a friend who is getting married on another mutual friend’s birthday this year, and they have decided to have a cake birthday cake at the end of the ceremony and have everyone at the wedding sing to the person who’s birthday it is. 

Post # 6
Member
7296 posts
Busy Beekeeper

i dont think its rude. i personally wanted to choose a date that didn’t fall on the birthday of anyone i know so the date would not make me think of anything else.  so if i were in your shoes, i would likely choose the weekend before or after because of my own reasons.  but is it rude to your nephew, i dont think so!!

Post # 7
Member
410 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

My wedding date lands the day before my best friend’s birthday AND on the day of my niece’s anniversary. Both happen to be my bridesmaids and they were both fine with the date.

Post # 8
Member
5993 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: May 2010

the only thing that would concern me is if its the nephews 1st birthday which might mean some absent family due to the date conflict but otherwise its always someones birthday, anniversary etc and you cant ask everyone if they are ok with the date

Post # 9
Member
1844 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

  We put a deposit down on our reception and ceremony venues, as well as set up some other things, only to find out that we were getting married on my cousin’s husband’s birthday. I felt really bad about it, but by the time we found out, the other dates had already been booked up for our month.

Post # 10
Member
474 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

I wanted to get married on my Grandfathers birthday (he passed away years ago) but it was my cousins birthday as well. If it was any other birthday besides her 16th, I would’ve gone for it, but I didn’t want to take away from her birthday. Actually, I didn’t care. But my Aunt would throw a fit and a half if there wasn’t a special cake for her or something (you can’t make this up). So I figured to hell with it.

I’d say if it’s not a milestone birthday (1st, 16th, 18th, 21st) go for it.

Post # 11
Member
3978 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

Not for a nephew, no. If it was FI’s mom’s birthday or something that might be different. When you have a lot of family it’s bound to be close to someone’s birthday. I might run it past FI’s sister if I were you, just so she doesn’t freak out when she hears.

Post # 12
Member
2542 posts
Sugar bee

We’re getting married on my uncle’s birthday. He doesn’t care. He used to be a DJ when he was my age so we’re going to get our DJ to do a birthday shout out to him and get him to pick a song to have played. I think he’ll like it.

Post # 13
Member
450 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: March 2012

We actually sat down with a calendar and marked off months that had a close family member birthday or anniversary, as well as major holiday. Other than St Patrick’s Day March was the only month that fit the bill. Not wanting to get married on the holiday weekend, we are getting married on March 25.

Post # 14
Member
1145 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: December 2011

@SaraP: Nope not rude at all.

Post # 15
Member
4046 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

I think it depends on your family and how they celebrate. My SIL has big parties for her kids birthdays, they are like a mini family reunion. I would avoid those dates just for that reason so as not to take anything away from her, as she has been hosting these events for a few years.

However, if there is nothing big planned for the birthday (or they could celebrate a week earlier) then I don’t think it is terribly rude.

Post # 16
Member
4803 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

I don’t think it’s rude, but an adult is going to take it MUCH better than a kid. I think it’s cute to get a little cake for them or something.

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