(Closed) Is it rude to have a lunch wedding when you have a lot of OOT guests?

posted 7 years ago in Etiquette
  • poll: Rude??
    Yes- have a traditional event : (2 votes)
    4 %
    No- Do what you can afford : (39 votes)
    68 %
    Kinda- let family know ahead of time : (15 votes)
    26 %
    other (post below) : (1 votes)
    2 %
  • Post # 3
    395 posts
    Helper bee

    I’m in the same boat; my family is on the East coast and his is on the West coast so they will all have to travel. I’ve always liked the idea of an afternoon wedding like your described better than an all-night event anyway so hopefully they will all be okay with it.

    Post # 4
    2104 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: July 2011

    @Luckygal5571: We had an 11 am wedding with a lunch reception…we did have some dancing and a sparkling wine toast, but all said and done, our reception was over at 3:30.  However, our families knew we needed to keep things simple for a number of reasons.  I say it’s fine, but we also provided a lot of info on things to do in our city and were able to spend time with family before the wedding.

    Post # 5
    46404 posts
    Honey Beekeeper
    • Wedding: November 1999

    I think it is fine. Your guests are there to witness and share the joy of your marriage, not your dinner.

    Post # 6
    171 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: December 2011

    My wedding is at 11 with lunch reception, we are however inviting anyone who wants to come back to my parents for leftovers and pizza this is when i will also cut my cake.

    The next day for Out of Town guests we are going to a cafe for brunch (pay your own way) so it winds up being a two day event

    Post # 7
    775 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: July 2012

    I think a lunch is fine. Regardless they are there to see you get married and you are still providing a meal. 

    Post # 8
    444 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: January 2012

    I don’t think there is anything wrong with it. They are coming to celebrate with you, and the length or timing of your event won’t stop them from doing that.

    If you can manage what @sconzzy is doing, that would be great, if only to allow everyone to spend a lot of time together.

    Post # 9
    566 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: September 2011

    You should hold the type of event that you can afford, and invite anyone you want. At the same time, I think holding a lunchtime wedding will mean that some people will choose not to attend – and you shouldn’t be offended or disappointed by that.

    Post # 10
    1278 posts
    Bumble bee

    It isn’t rude at all!  You need to do what you can afford and what you want.  I mean, to save money you could just elope, which would leave them out completely, so at least you are including them and they should be honored to be your guest!

    Post # 11
    4485 posts
    Honey bee

    I don’t understand the question at all. The fact that you have out of the area guests is moot. It really doesn’t matter when you have your reception. The only thing that is rude is not feeding your guests anything and asking them to pay their own way (food, drinks, etc). Tons of people have cake and coffee and call it day, and that’s not rude since it’s not during a mealtime but it is what they want and can afford, regardless of where their guests are travelling from. There is no difference between lunch and dinner other than the time of day it’s served, as it’s still a full meal. Therefore, there isn’t anything remotely rude about serving lunch. Serve what you want and don’t let anyone else dictate what happens at your wedding.

    Post # 12
    927 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: September 2012

    Do what you want and what you can afford. You don’t want to regret having a big wedding and going into debt just to justify your friends/family travelling. I’m sure they’d want to come regardless if you have a big traditional wedding. I think lunch weddings sound fun!

    The topic ‘Is it rude to have a lunch wedding when you have a lot of OOT guests?’ is closed to new replies.

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