(Closed) Is it weird?

posted 6 years ago in Relationships
Post # 2
Member
9076 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: December 2012

The way I see it, if you’re already planning a wedding, and agree to get married, you’re engaged. I’d tell the other people to keep their noses out of your business.

Post # 3
Member
9528 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper

Yeah, as long as both you and your SO are into the planning (and it’s not all one person with the other person being disinterested), I don’t think it’s weird. It’s not my place to judge other couples’ situations. What makes sense for one couple given their circumstances makes sense to me. Happy planning!

Post # 4
Member
47439 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

Keep planning, just stop sharing with these people.

Post # 5
Member
7890 posts
Bumble Beekeeper

If you guys are that committed to the wedding planning already, I agree you’re practically engaged already. You don’t need a ring or a formal proposal to be dedicated to spending your lives together. If you really want to do the ring stuff now, maybe you could have a placeholder proposal with an string ring or something. 

Post # 6
Member
2563 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2014

A ring doesn’t make you engaged, two people deciding to get married does.  Congrats, you’re engaged!

Post # 7
Member
1065 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2015

I think it’s a bit crazy when the woman is doing all the planning without having a discussion or idea of timeline with their SO (I knew a girl that bought a dress and her SO dumped her two months later when she thought he was going to propose!) But I think if it’s a mutual thing, then you are engaged.  The ring doesn’t make the engagement, the agreement to get married does.  Congratulations and happy planning!!

Post # 8
Member
953 posts
Busy bee

A ring doesn’t make an engagement. 

People are snarky jerk.  Press the ignore button and if there isn’t one..make one and keep it in your pocket.

Post # 9
Member
1317 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2014 - NH

I learned on the bee here the fact that everyone is mentioning above…you are not “ring official” but you are engaged.  You are planning the big day and there is nothing wrong with that!  We had our venue picked out and the day set before we had a ring, and we actually shared the date with our parents before I had it as well.  You will remember your “ring official” day, but enjoy every moment of planning.

Post # 11
Member
3584 posts
Sugar bee

You don’t need a ring to be engaged. If you are planning it than that is official enough. I hate when people butt into other people’s business.  You dont know the situation so why you asking. So if you do explain everything you said to us they can be like oh i am sorry i didn’t know. Yeah cuz it is not your business or your life. People always going to judge though and have an opinion. Its not weird so just ignore those people

Post # 12
Member
6393 posts
Bee Keeper

View original reply
Sukii:  I think they’re being rude.  I was engaged for three weeks without a ring.  My husband proposed to me, we realized it was too large, and so we sent it back to have it resized.  And then I spent the first two weeks of marriage without the set becuase we went and got it soldered.

Ther are always going to be people that are just rude wherever you go.  So like Taylor Swift says, and Mrs. Doubtfire does, “Shake it off”

Post # 13
Member
664 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: December 1969

If two people decide to get married, plan a wedding and then get hitched but never exchange a ring, were they never engaged? Of course not! Because no physical object is necessary for people to be engaged. It might be traditional but it’s not mandatory. If you’ve decided to wed and are planning a wedding, you’re engaged. Remember there are people all over the world, including the U.S., who get engaged and never exchange rings to signify that. So if you do it, it’s not weird. It’s actually perfectly normal.

Post # 14
Member
1083 posts
Bumble bee

If you guys are mutually planning a wedding, you are engaged, even without a ring. Congrats! In sure a ring will come in time 

Post # 15
Member
1443 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

My DH and I were engaged for almost 3 months before I got my engagement ring (I did have a ring I wore temporarily though). I think it’s “weird” to think you can’t be engaged without having an engagement ring 😛

Personally I liked having the formal proposal and then telling everyone about it before we started planning, but for everyone else, whatever works!

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