(Closed) Is it weird to ask her to be in my wedding?

posted 8 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 3
Member
120 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: April 2010

No I don’t think it’s weird. I have a couple of friends whom I was very closed to in high school. Now we live on different continents! So yeah, it’s hard to keep in touch sometimes. They couldn’t make it to my wedding (continents! visa!). But if they ask me to be in theirs, and I could make it, I would feel very honored. 

Post # 4
Member
5388 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: December 2010

No it is not weird. I have friends like that. I can just pick up where we left off like nothing happened because we still have that bond.

Post # 5
Member
3 posts
Wannabee
  • Wedding: September 2011

I think if you really want her to be in your wedding party, then you should ask her.  But be aware that she may not feel the same way.  Being apart of someone’s wedding party is a financial commitment for some and it usually involves a huge amount of volunteered time.

I think it would be a nice gesture to include her, especially if you really want her there.  It may be easiest to just tell her that she doesn’t have to commit because you don’t see each other as often as you used to – but would love to have her.  Ball’s in her court then. 

And if you two were close and seem to “pick up where you left off” everytime – I dont see a problem in just discussing it with her.

Hope this helps.  Good Luck.

Post # 6
Member
85 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: November 2010

I think it could be kind of wierd… but really it is up to you.  I would choose the closest people to you (or to your fiance).  If I were her, I’d be honored but may feel a little uncomfortable, especially if you are much closer to the other girls.  Also, if there are any other girls you are closer to but not asking to be bridesmaid, they may feel a little hurt.  But… it is completely up to you and you shouldn’t feel bad with whatever choice you make!! 

 

 

Post # 8
Member
1104 posts
Bumble bee

As you still have over a year until the wedding, I would hold off on asking the people you’re not sure about. If you’re questioning the decision now imagine what could still change. And when you decide who you want, just ask them – don’t worry about whether or not they can afford it or want to dress up or are sad about not being married themselves, the main thing is you want them by your side. They will say no if they don’t want to do it. I was asked to be Bridesmaid or Best Man for a high school friend in a similar situation to you – but to be honest to this day I wonder why she asked me as we are not in close contact anymore and her wedding album must be full of pictures of a person she no longer speaks to very often (i.e. me). I feel slightly awkward about it especially as I didn’t ask her to be my Bridesmaid or Best Man and I think it upset her (even though I stuck with family members for this exact reason). So in short, wait a little while before you decide 🙂

Post # 9
Member
2054 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: March 2011

I think if you decide to ask her she would be honored…but just keep in mind you guys have lost touch…so the chances of her being really involved in your wedding is not very likely. if you are ok with that then do it…but if you wanted her to help you out with things then I would think about it some more…

Post # 11
Member
562 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

I don’t think it would be weird at all.  One of my BMs is an old highschool friend who I was extremely close with back in the day, but now, 12 years later we only see each other maybe once a year if even.  But we’re still extremely close in that when we do see each other or talk to each other, it’s like we never missed a beat!  To me, that’s true friendship and those are the people I want to stand up with me. 

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