Is it weird/wrong to wear a gold ring on my wedding ring finger?

posted 8 months ago in Rings
Post # 3
Member
1243 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 1983

Have it enlarged by someone very skilled and wear it on your right hand. Otherwise the questions will be endless. (It’s lovely, by the way–how kind of your mother to give you her jewelry.)

Post # 4
Member
667 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2021

That’s a beautiful ring! It does very much look like a wedding band, and I think most people who see you wearing it on your left ring finger probably will automatically assume you’re married. (Depending on where you live. This is me just speaking for the US, I don’t know if it would be different in other parts of the world!) That doesn’t mean it’s “wrong” by any means to wear it if you want to! I think you should wear it if it makes you happy. But I think that people will assume it’s a wedding band.

Post # 6
Member
2235 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2018

It’s pretty! How lovely that you have women in your family who want to pass down their heirloom jewelry πŸ™‚ honestly, I’d assume that you were either engaged, married, or perhaps given a promise ring if I saw it on your left ring finger. However, it’s completely up to you to decide whether you care what others think and whether or not you’ll mind setting the record straight each time someone asks. 

Post # 7
Member
447 posts
Helper bee

I would just wear it, but I’m like your mom, I think that beautiful jewellery should be worn and admired. Looks beautiful on you! 

Post # 8
Member
968 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: City, State

So, my mother is also French, I am too. Salut!! ☺️
sorry to hear about your grandmother’s recent passing πŸ™

But that’s not the only reason I’m posting. I’m significantly older than you. I’ve been engaged twice (no longer engaged, though in a relationship, I still visit the bee because I enjoy jewelry). Never married. But I’ve always worn jewelry only on my left hand, that includes rings, watch, bracelets… I’m a righty and don’t like anything on my right side. Weird I know, lol. I actually only really wear rings on my left ring finger.

Just like you my mother passed down a lot of her jewelry to me, which include a bunch of diamonds. I turned some of those into a various rings which I wear as part of a stack. Does it look like not only I may be engaged and/ or married, absolutely. Have friends questioned it at times? Yes, a couple of them and a couple of colleagues too, simply because they felt compelled to say “congratulations” πŸ˜‚ that’s when I’ve explained that these are heirlooms and that’s where I choose to wear my rings. Then, that’s when the conversation usually ends. 
outside of those circles, I’ve been complimented a few times on it by strangers, with comments as “I love your engagement or wedding ring”, or something like “your wedding set is so sparkly” in such situations, I just smile and thank them. I don’t feel obligated to say anything.

Nobody has ever negatively commented on my choice to wear diamonds on my left ring finger. Remember, this custom is a societal one, and one that does not apply everywhere else in the world. Take France for example, ering were rare and so were diamonds, other gemstones were more common and typically on smaller scales. And honestly, if anyone has a negative opinion that does not bother me, it’s their opinion and it does not matter to me. Most of my pieces are extremely sentimental and I happily wear them. 
Here is a pic so you can see what I mean… I’d love to hear what you plan on doing  

As a PP suggested you could get it sized, but if you are happy wearing it on your ring finger, rock that beautiful ring and be happy!!!

Post # 9
Member
1755 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2020

Just wear it. Who cares if people assumes you’re married? It doesn’t affect you in any way. It’s not like you’re trying to pick up guys. 

I would be hesitant to resize vintage jewelry unless absolutely necessary. Maybe that ring can become your actual wedding band someday. 

Post # 10
Member
7979 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: February 1997

In the US, people will assume you’re married. If that doesn’t bother you, and it might not given that you’re in a relationship,  then it’s no one else’s business. 

Post # 11
Member
5766 posts
Bee Keeper

I am of the firm belief that if it sits in a drawer, it is a waste.  I would much rather any of my nieces wear my stuff than leave it sit in a drawer.  And in that fashion, I say wear it love it and enjoy it on any finger you like!

Post # 12
Member
131 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: August 2019 - Arlington, Virginia

The ring is awesome, doubly so with the significance behind it. I would wear the ring right now on the left hand, and not worry about it…most of the time the rest of the world is not paying much attention. For those family zoom calls where it might get awkward (thinking specifically of the boyfriend’s family,) just leave it off. In the long run, I would get it sized to fit either your middle finger or your right hand, since unless you plan on wearing this as a wedding or engagement ring you will have to do so anyway. I second the pp who said you should be sure to go to an experienced jeweler (NOT a mall store) for this. Yelp should help ID one in your area. While there, I would have them check out whether any of the prongs need to be retipped. Enjoy the ring and the meaning behind it!

Post # 15
Member
3514 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2017

It’s beautiful bee! I don’t think it’s bad luck or morally wrong by any means.. but people will definitely assume that you are married. I would get it resized and wear it on my right hand. 

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