(Closed) Is it worth it to number RSVPs?

posted 6 years ago in Paper
Post # 3
Member
735 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

Everybody wrote their names on our RSVP cards. 

I have gotten cards with the numbers written in pencil on the back -rather largely  The people who weren’t planning a wedding were kind of offended to have the higher numbers, they asked me “what number were you?” – I explained the reasoning, but the grammas weren’t impressed. So if you number, keep it discreet! 

Post # 4
Member
7609 posts
Bumble Beekeeper

I wanted to do this with invisible ink (for the reason the PP mentioned) but I couldn’t find the pens ANYWHERE so I just didn’t bother in the end!  Everyone wrote their names in just fine without my help.  If you think there’s someone who really won’t get it (someone younger or a single guy), you could put their initials veeeeeeeeery tiny on the back corner of their RSVP card.

Post # 5
Member
61 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

I numbered but so far (about 50% are in), I’ve never needed to refer to it. I also felt off about the high number issue….but never went so far as to go black light ninja style! πŸ™‚

Post # 6
Member
9056 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2010

I just did mine small in pencil on the back. Everybody wrote their names but mine looked like the picture so there wasn’t Much room for error, so that might have had a lot to do with it. 

Post # 7
Member
4803 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

I wrote numbers on the back, very small with light pencil. No one asked about it, and it definitely came in handy when several guests forgot to fill out their names – many whom I was surprised by, like people who had just planned their own wedding and should of known better!

Post # 8
Member
420 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: January 2013

I’m confused.  Won’t you get the response card back in an envelope with their name and address on it?  Do people not use return addresses on envelopes anymore?  I’m not doing printed invitations and I feel like I’m missing something here.  I’ve also never gotten a wedding invitation that was fancy enough for a response card (they’ve always just had phone numbers to call and RSVP to) so I’ve never actually seen one or given it any thought.  Someone help me understand please! lol  I feel like such a hillbilly right now for not knowing about any of this.

Post # 9
Member
4803 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

@AllTheGoodUsernamesAreTaken:  A lot of people don’t bother with putting the return address. You send the RSVP card in an envelope with your name and address on it, and pre-stamp it, so most people just fill out the RSVP card, seal the envelope, and toss it in the mail. Some people will put their info in the return address spot…but the people that don’t are usually also the people who forget to write their name on the RSVP.

Post # 10
Member
516 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

Instead of buying the special pen and writing the number on all of them and potentially making my invites look funny, I decided to pre-return-address the RSVP envelopes for each guest. It’s convenient for them, makes it SUPER easy for you when you get them, and if anything happens to their RSVP for any reason and doesn’t make it to me..it will be returned to them and they will know. I would rather spend a little extra time doing that than time writing numbers on the cards.

Post # 11
Member
2073 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

I was glad I numbered mine.  We got a couple back that were blank and a few that were completely illegible.  Our RSVP cards folded in half so I wrote a very small number on the inside corner, lightly in pencil.  If anyone noticed, no one said anything.  A friend of ours who got married about a year before we did told me she didn’t number hers and it was a pain in the butt trying to figure out who sent theirs back blank or what name was written.  I think we got about 5 (of 125) invites back who had bothered to put a return address label on the envelopes.

Post # 12
Member
420 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: January 2013

@Wonderstruck: Thanks so much for the reply πŸ™‚   I would have never guessed people would send a letter in the mail without a return address.  I guess they’re not worried about getting it sent back if there’s a problem with it.  So how does the response card actually work then?  The pic above is said to be simple to figure it out, but I don’t see an option that you’re not attending.  Is that the “in spirit” box?  Do you just not send the response card if you’re not attending?  Isn’t that rude to not tell them you’re not coming though?  I can totally understand how all of this would be really confusing to someone who hadn’t experienced it before.  I’m confused by it.  lol   I feel so out of the loop sometimes with all this wedding planning stuff. πŸ˜›  I actually asked my mom if she knew how to fill out a response card since I felt so silly for not knowing when ya’ll are making it seem like common sense and she didn’t know how to do the one in the picture either. 

Sorry for threadjacking btw.  Maybe it’s useful to know there’s dummies like me out there who don’t understand how these response cards work though so you can number them if you need to keep track better?  *fingers crossed* πŸ™‚

Post # 13
Member
9056 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2010

@AllTheGoodUsernamesAreTaken:  Mine were not typical RSVP cards. We did ours that way because we had to submit the full name of every guest to the front gate of a private/paid admission garden to be let in.  I just posted as a potential reason all my time spent numbering went to waste. But yes “in spirit” was the “no” option :). At the end of the day i actually did a second ru of simple yes/no reply cards for the guests that may not understand/have heard the expression “I’ll be there in spirit!” as a decline, so you’re definitely not alone πŸ™‚

A lot of times rsvp cards are like 

________________

___ will attend

___ regrets 

Amd people will check the box but not write their name on the line, or just put a check mark in both boxes when you invite a family of four and you have no idea which is coming and which isnt or various other issues. 

Post # 16
Member
420 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: January 2013

@SapphireSun:  hehe ok thanks for the explanation, I was feeling really silly.  I do think I could figure out the second option pretty easily though so I feel better about that.  πŸ™‚  

It doesn’t make any sense to me that someone would check both boxes, but it does make sense that some people might not know to put their name down on the first line.  I can think of a few people I know who might assume that line was there for decoration or something having never seen anything like it before lol  Even those people I’m thinking of would know to put a return address on an envelope though, having learned it way back in elementary school.  Sometimes people do the strangest things, and sometimes things one person thinks are strange are perfectly normal to someone else I suppose.  I’m starting to feel really lucky we’re not doing printed invitations. lol

@FutureMrsLodge:  I can totally see my mom not getting around to returning the card in a timely manner.  She would probably put it in her purse intending to mail it ASAP and then leave it there all the way until the host called her to check if she was coming or not.  She’s a bit spacy though.  My fingers are crossed that you won’t have to deal with any guests like that.  πŸ™‚  Honestly, it sounds like response cards can be easily misunderstood or forgotten about for anyone who hasn’t used them before or is generally flaky.  I say use the special pen if that makes it even a tiny bit easier on yourself.

Thanks for the help ladies!

 

I’ve just had an idea!  Could you write their name on the line on the response card for them?  That way they can’t forget to do it and you don’t have to worry about buying a special pen or keeping track of what number belonged to who.  I’m not sure if that’s the “proper” way to do things, but it sounds like it’s idiot proof and possibly easier/less time consuming than the special pen thing.

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