(Closed) Is it wrong for me to cut my Dad out of my life

posted 5 years ago in Family
  • poll:
  • Post # 2
    Member
    860 posts
    Busy bee

    This is pretty much the most valid reason ever for cutting someone out of your life. He is a bad person and you should not feel bad. Burn your bridges and run. 

    Post # 3
    Member
    329 posts
    Helper bee

    He is not your father, he is a monster. Fathers aren’t supposed to abuse their children. I’m so sorry you experienced such horrific trauma. Do not feel guilty. Perhaps you can talk to a therapist to help you heal. Hugs!

    Post # 4
    Member
    11526 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: June 2015

    You did the right thing, bee. Never doubt that. Your father is sick and if you allow him into your life, he will make you sick. You deserve protection from him. 

    Post # 5
    Member
    394 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: May 2018

    Don’t feel badly at all. He betrayed your trust on the deepest level and he doesn’t deserve any part in your life after that. If you are in a position to, think about using this as a time to get closer to your sister, because if anyone will know what you’re going through, it’ll be her.

    Post # 6
    Member
    1445 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: June 2015

    barnes66:  How could you possibly feel bad for distancing yourself from an abuser? It sounds like he is a perfect example of why not everyone should procreate. For him, it just meant that he  had convenient victims. If he can’t be prosecuted, at least you should protect yourself…and don’t feel guilty for that!

    Post # 7
    Member
    1059 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: December 2014 - Loft

    I am so sorry this happened to you. I can’t imagine the graciousness it has takeN you to not cut him out by now. I feel sad that you have to question whether or not you should cut him out. I don’t speak to my father and the reasons are far less warnented than this. are you looking for someone to tell you it’s ok? Because honestly it is. There is no better reason. let youself heal. 

    Post # 9
    Member
    1542 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: November 2011

    You did the right thing, he’s mentally ill or a sociopath.

    Post # 10
    Member
    6675 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: February 1997

    He may biologically be blood, but you did not have a father. This man is a criminal who should not be living freely. You are absolutely right to eliminate him from your life, and I am glad you are getting counseling. Never, ever doubt that cutting him out of your life was and will continue to be the best decision. There is nothing healthy that can come out of any sort of relationship with him. The mind plays tricks on a person, but always remember that YOU have nothing to feel bad about.

    Post # 11
    Member
    84 posts
    Worker bee
    • Wedding: June 2015

    i only needed to read the first five words. cut him OUT.

    • This reply was modified 4 years, 8 months ago by  nowai.
    Post # 12
    Member
    47260 posts
    Honey Beekeeper
    • Wedding: November 1999

    barnes66:  Your first and utmost responsibility is to yourself. You need to do whatever it takes to keep yourself safe. In your situation, as in far too many families, that means cutting someone out of your life. You cannot take the chance that you will have to deal with this again, Bad enough that you have to process what happened before, you do not want a repeat situation.

    Be strong and know that whatever happens to your Dad is because of choices he made, not you.

    Post # 13
    Member
    75 posts
    Worker bee

    uhm.. Im pretty sure you know the answer to this. You need to steer clear of him and never look back. you must harbor a lot of hurt, resentment, and regret, but DO NOT ever forgive him. You feel like his is attracted to you? I mean what? No! I am glad to hear you are seeking counseling and I pray that you do for a long time coming. Never talk to this man or associate with him in any way. He’s sick and clearly done this to multiple people.. god knows who else. Im so sorry you went through this! Please keep up with talking about your hurt and working through all that youve been through.

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