(Closed) is my boyfriend planning a proposal? (insight please)

posted 5 years ago in Proposals
Post # 3
Member
166 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

it’s coming! get excited! πŸ™‚ good luck bee and do inform us when it happens!

Post # 4
Member
932 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

I guess it’s possible? It seems to me like if you’re ready for marriage, you guys would be discussing marriage and planning your lives together. Most couples who get engaged do so after a great deal of discussion. If you don’t feel comfortable asking him if an engagement is in your near future, I’d say you’re still a ways off from getting engaged. 

ETA: Please don’t think I’m trying to criticize your relationship! You guys sound so happy together, and I certainly didn’t mean to imply you shouldn’t hope for engagement. I just think you should stop wondering if he’s going to propose and start talking about if he’s going to propose!

Post # 5
Member
3257 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

If you have an answer you’re sure of, wait and see.  If you don’t know (or if you’re going to say no) do everything in your power to prevent him having the opportunity to ask.

Post # 6
Member
9955 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: December 2012

Hi @hazeleyez:  first and foremost… I see you are NEW here… so a BIG Welcome to “the Hive”

Your post brings two thoughts for me to the forefront…

You say you guys haven’t really discussed marriage.

As someone else mentioned, that usually comes up long before a proposal (the sharing of each’s LIFE PLANS)

and

Curious, if you haven’t gotten to that stage yet… then how long have you been dating each other ?

 

Post # 7
Member
405 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

If you haven’t had a serious discussion about your futures together I would be weary of getting your hopes up. Nothing would be worse for your relationship than getting hyped up over every dinner date only to become agitated and upset when he doesn’t propose. 

Post # 8
Member
169 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: October 2015

I agree with what the PPs have said. You *might* be getting ahead of yourself. Proposals and weddings are quite an exciting time, but you have to remember what it’s really about–two people with similar life goals committing to share their futures together. I would be a bit nervous about a proposal from someone that I haven’t discussed my dreams, goals, aspirations, priorities, etc. with at great lengths. That being said, you know your boyfriend better than any of us–do you think marriage is on his mind?

Post # 10
Member
90 posts
Worker bee

Well, not be looking for issues, but you say you haven’t been dating very long and that he’s been engaged before?  Did it not work out for him last time because he rushed into things too quickly?  Did he get engaged before he and the last girl knew each other well enough?  I know previous relationships of his aren’t any of your business, but if he’s done that before, it wouldn’t be surprising if he did it again.  He could be sincere about his feelings, but that doesn’t mean the two of you are ready to get married.

 

You know if you two are ready to get married or not.  Just make sure marriage is something you are both ready for and aren’t rushing into.  

Post # 11
Member
2854 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

@hazeleyez:  We never discussed marriage ever and got engaged 8 months after we started dating. I opted for a long engagement so I coluld get used to the idea. Discussions prior to engagement don’t always happen, sometimes there are surprise proposals

Post # 12
Member
169 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: October 2015

@nycsa:  This is awesome! Congratulations πŸ™‚

 

@hazeleyez: To OP–no two couples are the same. What works for some may not necessarily be the same for another. My boyfriend and I have been dating for well over 5 years and have just started to get the ball rolling on getting engaged. But we started dating when we were 18, so our timing and what’s right for us probably won’t apply to you. Especially since it sounds like the two of you have much different priorities and are at a different stage in life than my boyfriend and I. Honestly, though, I don’t think it could hurt to talk about marriage and figure out if he has plans or not. It won’t necessarily ruin the surprise, but will ensure the two of you are on the same page πŸ˜‰ Good luck!

Post # 13
Member
2025 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

@hazeleyez:  It could be coming but I wouldnt hold your breath! Not saying he wont, im saying it may take longer than your expecting! That happend to me….i was thinking when we went out our first BIG take a plane to get there trip it was gonna happen…it didnt…for over 2 more years!! So if he doesnt do it soon dont get disheartened.

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