Post # 1
- Wedding: August 2018 - Banquet Hall/Conference Center
From reading some of these threads, it seems like people really go all out and get their bridal party something very personal and expensive, like pearls or sports/concert tickets (~$100). I see the sentiment behind this, but I’m already providing them a free shared wedding hotel room and covering the cost of hair, bouquets, and getting ready robes. For 2 of the girls who are in financial constraints, I am also helping with dress costs. I understand that the hair/bouquets/robes are more for my pictures and are not considered gifts, but with all of that combined, it’s adding up for 5 girls.
With my finances in mind, I am getting all five girls the same thing – a floral leather Coach travel pouch (regularly $125, on sale for $30) filled with a rose gold bracelet (regularly $50, on sale for $20) and rose gold earrings ($10). Yes I would like these to be used for the wedding, but I purposely picked items that are evergreen and can be used in the future with anything. The pouch, earrings, and bracelet added up to $60 per person.
Is it weird that I got everyone the same thing? For what it’s worth, since most live out of town, my bridesmaids aren’t doing anything extra like planning a shower or bachelorette. I also don’t have a maid of honor, so other than being my friend and walking in a line, there’s nothing to really “thank” anyone for.
Do you think that what I got is enough? Help! I’ve only ever seen one other friend get married, and she got everyone the same thing as well (a small Coach wristlet) since we planned her bachelorette.
Post # 2
That’s a lovely gift! I’d love and use it.
Post # 3
I think you’re being incredibly generous! If any of your bridesmaids feel like it’s not enough, I’d majorly side-eye them.
Post # 4
Sounds great to me! Totally practical and reusable. I’d be happy to receive that 🙂
Post # 5
Gifts are just that – gifts. There should be no expectation about the cost or type. However, it doesn’t matter how much you spend on the gifts, they’re nice gifts. I’m sure your bridal party will be thankful, and all of the gifts sound nice and useful, and you didn’t commit the sin of personalizing them or putting your wedding date on them.
Also, I’ve never heard of a bridesmaid paying for their bouquet, so that’s definitely not a gift or unusual that you paid for them.
Post # 6
- Wedding: August 2018 - Banquet Hall/Conference Center
annili : nifer317 : knotyet : TheGridMonster : Thanks for the reassurance, all! I was getting a little anxious and needed to hear that haha. I hope they like it :). I plan to pack each gift with an individual, handwritten card as well.
knotyet : Yeah, I was going to personalize the robes, but decided to not do that so it would be more reusable and also save me money haha. And yup, I understand that it is my responsibility to pay for bouquets 🙂
Post # 7
I don’t think it’s cheap, these ‘gifts’ are just all for you. So while I can appreciate you spending money on them it doesn’t seem like actual gifts to acknowledge their friendship and thank them for standing up with you. Instead you are giving them photo props so they all match in your photos.
Post # 8
I don’t get why people are against having bridesmaid gifts being stuff for the wedding like the jewlery. I would have loved to not have to buy jewlery for the weddings I have been in!
Your gifts are lovely. I have NEVER been in a wedding with the expectation of getting a great gift. It was because I wanted to be there for my friend who was getting married.
Post # 9
There’s nothing to thank them for besides being your friend and walking in a line? How about the fact that they are taking time out of their lives to come to your wedding and support you getting married? And traveling for it no less, so taking even more time and energy. Your gifts are fine if that’s what they like, I’m not commenting on the gifts, just that statement you made is pretty cold.
Post # 10
I’m going to be the outlier here. They seem more like gifts for you/your wedding, and items that are your taste. (ie, robes, identical jewelry you hope is worn at the wedding)
I believe gifts should reflect the recipient’s taste and style. It’s not a about being cheap but about being thoughtful and personalized. (And by personalized, I mean specific to each person’s taste/style, not monogrammed!)
I would much rather have a heart-felt handwritten thank you note than a cookie-cutter gift identical to the ones received by the other members of the bridal party.
Post # 11
While it’s nice that you are giving them the jewelry you want them to wear for your wedding, I’m not really sure it could be defined as a gift. A gift is just not something you give to someone; it is something that you give with the intention of delighting the recipient. And it really doesn’t have to cost an arm and a leg. A true gift says “I know what you enjoy/gives you joy, I pay attention, and I want you to be very happy with this gift”. It takes a little imagination, a little homework, but is is so gratifying to see a friend happy about a gift! Hypothetically speaking, one of your BMs could be a biking enthusiast, one could love gardening, and one could be a coffee “snob”. With that knowledge, you could give each one a lovely thank-you gift, all under $60.00; just for example:
Post # 12
There is literally nothing wrong with giving your bridesmaids jewelry as a gift, whether you have them wear it in the wedding or not. It is still a gift, and only on the bee will you find negative nancys implying that it’s not a real gift. I think I’ve been given jewelry as a gift every single time I’ve been a bridesmaid. Some of the pieces I never wore again becaues they weren’t my taste, but some I still have and wear regularly. Either way I always appreciated it.
Your gifts all sound lovely!
Post # 14
Your gifts sound lovely. Dont overthink it.
Post # 15
akshali2000 : I love that idea!! It’s super cute and something they can actually use. Stop being so hard on yourself, bee. You’ve done a great job with these gifts!