Is my husband a thoughtless gift giver or just clueless?

posted 6 months ago in The Lounge
Post # 31
6628 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: April 2016

Ha! My best friend just told me yesterday that he’s getting his gf a Dyson for Christmas. I very clearly asked him if he was sure that was something she actually wanted. Apparently she asked for it specifically, so he’s good! 😉

I think you possibly need to be more clear as to what kind of gifts you’d like and what exactly you mean by “frivolous.” As a PP mentioned, maybe he thinks that a Dyson falls into that category because they’re fancier vacuums? I’d probably tell him flat out for next year that household items are off the table.

Post # 32
570 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2007 - City, State

anonomee :  I told my husband about this post because we had joked about it a few days ago. He thinks giving things like a vacuum to a wife is just ridiculous and archaic. I’m extremely practical and would love a Dyson vacuum, I’m also a stay at home mom and love vacuuming, hahaha, but he said even if you wanted a vacuum I wouldn’t get you one, you’re not a maid you’re a human being. His point was that I can buy a vacuum for the house myself and he can give gifts to me that are about me as a person.

Post # 33
10186 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 2010

anonomee :  

Exchange it for a Dyson hair dryer.  Step two, send the dryer to me. I would so love to have one of those. Problem solved.

Shameless and incorrigible gender stereotyper that I am, I feel compelled to point out that many men just suck at gift giving. My Dh isn’t especially good at it either. I’m used to it. If I want something, I buy it myself.


Post # 34
432 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

I would kill for vacuum or microwave lol. Instead I get expensive lotion and perfume which I never use lol. I know he buy it thinking I must loved it. Men are just clueless..

Post # 35
10186 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 2010

All right.  I challenge the Hive to come up with a worse gift from their SOs than the one I got as a birthday gift from my a-hole exh:  a vibrator.

Thank gawd his kids weren’t staying with us that weekend.


Post # 36
949 posts
Busy bee

sassy411 :  I had an exhusband give me a huge mechanics tool set. That he promptly put in his garage. 

Post # 37
2539 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: November 2017

anonomee :  so what happened? Did you give him a household gift under the guise that it was *his* gift, as he does to you?

Post # 38
4815 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: July 2018


 sassy411 :  Maybe it’s just me but I definitely think the vacuum is a way worse gift than a vibrator.

Post # 39
109 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: November 2018

zzar45 :  yea it’s definitely just you for sure haha! DYSON ALL DAY EVERYDAY! 

Post # 40
320 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2019

you have to accept he’s shit at this and give him a list. We share an ASOS account and I fill it up and recently he’s suprised me as I think he’s starting to understand what I like etc as a gift so give him a little nudge.. 

Post # 41
894 posts
Busy bee

sassy411 :  My exh gave me a velvet teddy Santa costume. That I unwrapped at Xmas with his family. Several months after we had separated. 

I was not amused. 

Post # 42
26 posts
  • Wedding: January 2010

I give my hubby specific guidelines on gifts, and he is under instructions not to buy anything significant without checking with me first. I would return the vacuum and buy what you wanted with the money.

Maybe tell him not to buy you anything without confriming that you actually want it first? The whole “surprise gift” thing is pretty overrated in my book though.

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