(Closed) Is my husband or the girl out of line?

posted 3 years ago in Emotional
Post # 151
Member
124 posts
Blushing bee

bobsgirl2007:  Hugs and good riddance. 

He is bluffing to manupulate you into watever he needs you to do. You should call his bluff and divorce his immature ass. What a POS of human he is. I am so mad for you. 

You deserve so much better! 

Post # 152
Member
96 posts
Worker bee

morningcoffee:  bellbee:  Agree completely. I didn’t know this was really a thing until it was done to me. The minute you push back on something they are doing that is innapropriate, they suddenly “don’t love you” anymore. It’s pathetic, immature, and unhealthy. You deserve better.

Post # 153
Member
124 posts
Blushing bee

carmens:  Yep, my ex husband used to do it to me. He would mention divorce about once every quarter until I finally said – okay let’s do it and moved out two weeks later. He was crying and begging me to take him back, but I just didn’t want to live like that anymore. 

Post # 154
Member
96 posts
Worker bee

Puss_in_Boots:  Good for you! 🙂 I am sure the divorce was difficult but sometimes you just have to choose yourself when they are manipulating you that way. You shouldn’t have to prove you are worthy of their love every time they throw a tantrum and decide they don’t love you anymore when they are the ones crossing boundaries. 

Post # 155
Member
3092 posts
Sugar bee

1. He’s banging her

2. I hope his dick falls off

Post # 156
Member
881 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2006

I originally replied to this thread with my views on the situation and then I read the divorce update. 

I am so sorry for your pain but I also feel like I must say that you will be better off in the long without this disrespectful and manipulative fool. You are a strong woman and you will emerge from this crisis completely triumphant. 

See if you can find evidence of an affair. That will help in divorce proceedings. I am certain that your husband is at least having an emotional affair with his coworker if not a physical one. 

Post # 157
Member
207 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2016

I think your husband is out of line, he is the one married to you therefore he owns you respect and if he knows you dont like it he shouldnt do it

Post # 159
Member
11651 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2015

bobsgirl2007:  is he being violent? Why else would you need to leave your home because he wants a divorce so he can stay out drinking till 4 am and spend hours tucking female coworkers into bed? 

He can move out. He created this mess, let him fix it.

Post # 160
Member
2699 posts
Sugar bee

bobsgirl2007:  Well you don’t need to stay in a shelter. Go to your home! Start looking for a job and get all of your ducks in a row. Cry later. Or not! He isn’t worth your tears or you smearing your good makeup. Change is hard. You can do this though!! You have everything you need to pull this off and see it through. You can make your plan WHILE living in the house. You’ve done NOTHING wrong. HE should be the accomodating one in this scenario.

Post # 161
Member
239 posts
Helper bee

 

bobsgirl2007:  I agree with BalletParker. You need to kick him out. If you can’t do that, why can’t you go to your parent’s? If they live close, I’m sure they would understand and take you in!

Post # 162
Member
2872 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: November 2015

Your husband is an asshat. Kick him out and heck BURN all his belongings. What a complete douche. We are here for you too. So sorry you are going through this.

Post # 163
Member
2699 posts
Sugar bee

Have you lawyered up yet?? Get on it. Pronto. You didn’t just up and decide you didn’t want to be married anymore – HE did. There’s a cost to that. When you’re finished with him he won’t be able to AFFORD to drink at 4am. They’ll be chilling in some lawn chairs sharing a sandwich and a Budweiser. THAT thought alone will keep the tears at bay for the next couple of weeks at least. Now get busy about your business.

Post # 164
Member
991 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

agree with the others! This is no time to be passive. Kick him out, move to another bedroom, start looking for an apartment online…sort it out but no need for a shelter Unless he’s being violent! 

Post # 165
Member
469 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: December 2015

timethief:  That’s not how it was presented at first, the story changed a bit as more posts were added.  At first the husband used to go to mentoring meetings and invited her to one to see how it was and then all they talked about was mentoring and work stuff and she felt excluded.  That’s how it sounded from the first couple of posts.

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