(Closed) Is romance important for the wedding night?

posted 13 years ago in Toronto
Post # 3
716 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2009 - City Hall

You know, I don’t want to take your FI’s "side", but I would find out what exactly this company does for decorations. Rose petals? champagne? candles? Is it possible that one of your wedding party members could take care of this for you? Maybe have your Maid/Matron of Honor go decorate the room for you before you get there. Check out Mrs. Tiramisu’s post about this:


I believe Mrs. Avocado’s bridal party got in to their room before they did too. If it’s the expense your Fiance is concerned about, perhaps this could be an option for you guys, too.

Post # 4
380 posts
Helper bee

I think ambience is important but keep in mind that most honeymoon suites are already pretty nicely decked out.  At the very least, they will usually provide some champagne and a small treat to congratulate you.  Some flowers, candles, and music might be nice but they really won’t add that much to the suite, unless the place is a dump, in which case, flowers, candles and music still won’t do anything to mask that.

I agree that you could have your bridal party or maybe DOC get to the room before you do just to light a few candles and add some finishing touches.  I don’t think that the services they provide could really add so much.  If it’s a nice hotel room, it will look nice regardless!

Post # 5
751 posts
Busy bee

I’d be interested to see what all they would do, would it be way more than what your bridal party would do if they were "romancing up" your room? If so, and if it’s something that’s important to you (and in your budget) then I would do it. But honestly, I’d be so happy to be spending that night with my husband that even without any decorations I’d be thrilled anyways for our first night together as husband and wife.

Post # 6
1172 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

I’m going to ahead and say that it might not be worth the $$, it could be well spent somewhere else.

I think that we will be just fine is the "romance" department without decorations. We are no muss, no fuss though.

Post # 7
167 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: March 2010

I’d have to agree with the other posters and say that the romance lies in the two of you, not necessarily in the decor. However…if this is a major deal for you, you could argue that this is a once in a lifetime thing, you only get one first night together, etc, and the less time and stress you have to deal with that night, the better. If you have the money, this could definitely be a good opportunity to relax and let someone else take the reins, especially if you planned the whole wedding yourself.

Post # 9
8375 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2009

If you have a close enough girl friend, drop a hint to her and maybe she and a friend can split this as a gift for you!

Personally, my Fiance and i are staying in a cheap hotel the night of our wedding! It’s not fancy but it’ll do the trick. IMO, our honeymoon is the biggee! Like he said, the bed is the best part of the room anyways and we’re only going to be there from midnight til 9 am or so, hahahaha.

I really love the idea of asking someone to gift it for you! What a wonderful SHOWER GIFT IDEA! drop a hint to your Maid/Matron of Honor

Post # 10
207 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2009

In a previous life, by the time I got that far, we were both so tired it didn’t matter.

Post # 11
1144 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: March 2021

as Maid/Matron of Honor i have done candles flowers etc for all the brides. For one bride we had a pleasure party at her bachelorette where she picked things and we all chipped in. they came in the week befor ethe wedding and we left them in a basket in the middle of the bed! For another bride who had a lingere shower i hung it up in the bathroom so she could come out in her sexy lingere. Sometimes the groomsmen will do this stuff too, just be clear you don’t want any pranks!

Post # 12
202 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2009

Wedding night romance is something I have been looking foward to for a whole year. We are on the no sex before marriage program and yes, I am totally expecting romance. We are flying to Adelaide, South Australia and getting married in a beautiful beach side Church. We have bagpipes and nearly an entire bistro to ourselves with a hotel room in the city. While we aren’t planning for a professional, our hotel is beautiful alone. I plan on having flowers sent to our room and I am ordering a small wedding cake, like the maybe the top, however, most places are wanting to make a cake around 7inches and I’d really like it smaller and more like the top of the cake, tradition and all. I am debating on champagne or red wine (we are in Australia after all). I am pulling for extra help from the photographer and the Pastor.

I read a wedding site that had the husband setting up the room, checking in early, having treats for his wife, making the room comfortable and so all he has to do is bring her back and relish her.

I don’t think many men these days plan like that, they kind of leave that up to us, but they should be told that an effort in romance on the wedding night can go a long way.

I am with the camp that if you aren’t going to check into the room and set it up yourself, maybe have a few girl friends you trust so that you don’t end up with little pranks being played. Because i could think of really naughty things to do that would not be romantic.

The money saved on the rental could be used to purchase some Kama Sutra products and fun lingerie.


Best of luck.

Post # 13
27 posts
  • Wedding: July 2007

I know it is supposed to be a big night, but by the time we got done partying with our friends and family into the wee hours of the morning – it was all we could do to get out of the wedding dress and get all the pins out of my hair before we both passed out cold!  Think about what your day will be like and what is planned before you spend money on this service – in my case we would have ended up sleeping on top of the rose petals!

Post # 14
12 posts
  • Wedding: October 2011

yes… plan something where the room is dressed up.  I’m going to do this.  Google “night of romance” Toronto.  Two woman do this… but I might just get someone to do this for me and my guy!

Post # 15
12 posts
  • Wedding: August 2011

Sorry, but I agree with your Fiance… If you booked a honeymoon suite – maybe the hotel can provide this service for a better cost then an outside company will. I’ve spoken to ALL of my married friends, and 98% of them said that by the end of day you are SO tired, romance is one of the last things on your mind :))

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