(Closed) Is there anyone you secretly hope will not attend?

posted 8 years ago in Family
Post # 32
633 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: April 2014

Part of me is hoping that FI’s SIL will RSVP no b/c she won’t want to keep her son out late, nor will she want him to eat our food…but he will be 2 1/2-3 by the time we actually get married, so she may have calmed down a little by then!

I really don’t want ANYONE to not show up after RSVPing yes…b/c I’m being totally uncouth and inviting a B-List whenever I get a No, just so I can have more friends there. Every single one of FI’s small circle of friends is invited, so I have to pick and choose from my larger group…

Post # 33
7976 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: July 2013 - UK


I’m going to say that, IMO, “anyone who is going to sulk through my ceremony” should probably skip the ceremony and just come to the reception, and leave it at that.

Beyond that, everyone is welcome.

Post # 34
54 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: December 2013


my uncle (and his long-term girlfriend) who are just plain rude to me, and make inappropriate comments CONSTANTLY about the relationship (or lack thereof) my sisters and i have with my deceased fathers wife.

one of my FI’s closest friends. he constantly flakes on EVERYTHING (birthday dinners, engagment party) unless it involves drugs.

a few of my FI’s extended family, who we’ve been told we ‘have’ to invited, and they won’t accept.

most of my extended family, they’re very very judgey and i already can hear them judging every element of my wedding. 


Post # 35
846 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

i would love it if most of mine and my FI’s extended families don’t show up.

Post # 36
2093 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

View original reply
@karineh:  Heee hee…another future SMIL here!!! My future Mother-In-Law is fine…. It’s the step that has gone out of her way to be rude to me and Fiance. She has some weird competition thing with other women & if she can’t dominate them, she goes out of her way to be rude. 


Post # 37
50 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

My sister.  She was my Maid/Matron of Honor and only attendant at my first wedding and did not bother to spend the night with me at our family home the night before.  She’s narcissistic and makes rude comments all the time.  Couldn’t even ACT pleasant the day she met my Fiance, but criticized the food I ordered while taking HER and my nephew and her boyfriend out to breakfast.


I would rather have my father’s wife (with whom he had a 20 year affair) there than my sister.  And step-mom IS coming, so I pray my rude sister won’t cause a scene.  She can’t stand SM and will likely hiss “Why is SHE here?” 


Because I like her better than I like you and she, along with Dad, broke up our family!

Post # 38
6401 posts
Bee Keeper

Nope. We’ve only invited people we actually want to be there.

Post # 39
96 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

There’s a woman who has been a close friend of SO’s family for literally YEARS (since before SO was born I believe)

She and I do not get along at all… and SO doesn’t like her either… 

She is, however, the type of person who feels that she is just SOOOOO close to us that she’d literally burst into tears if she weren’t invited.

She thinks we’re ‘friends’…. I think that I’d have a lot less tension in life if I didn’t have to deal with her again (drama creator.)
I am still hoping to work out somehow to dodge extending an invitation… We’ll see 

Post # 40
2362 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2013 - B&B

Another one here who just kind of wants the “25% RSVP no” kinda thing lol. We aren’t inviting more than the maxiumum that our venue can hold, but it’s still 200 PEOPLE and I really really hope we have closer to 150 or 165. I have crunched so many numbers… right now, based on factors like known jobs, how far they have to travel, overheard plans, age, etc etc, we have 165 who I have deemed “probable”. Surely some of the “probably nots” will show and some of the “probably yes’s” won’t be able to, so I’m hoping I’ll be alright!!

Post # 41
1293 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: December 2018

Wouldn’t it be nice if we didn’t have to invite people that we didn’t want to share our day with? It’s supposed to be about us after all, but seems weddings all are all about concessions!

Post # 42
4099 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

Yes…. <,< and they’re one of the closest relatives you can have.. And it’s not my sister…

Post # 43
3173 posts
Sugar bee

FH’s little cousin. He thinks the kid is super annoying. They went to a family event this weekend and he told me, “XX is no longer annoying in the same way but now he is even more annoying in another way.” He’s 10 years old and an overindulged only child. FH doesn’t really understand children too. Our wedding is last minute so his family can’t make it.

Edit: Also, my parents who decided not to come and my older brother who told me he is coming. We do not have a great relationship – he is the completely overindulged, cannot do wrong boy. We have not had a conversation in over 10 years. It’s an awkward relationship at best. I am walking myself down the aisle (even if my dad was there, I would walk myself), and FH’s mom thought my brother should walk me down. FH laughed.

Post # 44
5285 posts
Bee Keeper

 YEP!!!! My wacked out cousin and her rude fiance and her father..I hope they just somehow cant make it cause they are just plain rude and I didnt even want to invite them to begin with!!!!

Post # 45
945 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

This one is bad… my FI’s best man… I’m really hoping he flakes out and doesn’t buy the plane tickets to come, but if he does come, his girlfriend can just not come with their kid. I’m cool with that compromise. 😀 

There are a couple family members that I would be outright shocked if they came and I’m kind of hoping they don’t come, but if they do it’s not a big deal. 

Post # 46
3418 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2014 - Manhattan Church Rec Center

My mother’s sister and her youngest daughter. My mom went so above and beyond for this chick’s wedding and got no recognition at all. Plus my mom’s sister is a snake in the grass. 

They are not getting invites though her eldest daughter and my male cousin (her son) have been supportive of me my whole life and will be welcome

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