(Closed) is there such a thing as sending a thank you card too soon?

posted 6 years ago in Etiquette
  • poll: is there such a thing as too soon for a thank you card?
    no way! it shows how much they love and appreciate my gift : (41 votes)
    79 %
    yes! i would feel like its an automatic/unthoughtful response : (1 votes)
    2 %
    nah, im just happy i got one : (10 votes)
    19 %
    thank you card? whats that? : (0 votes)
  • Post # 3
    4352 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: August 2013

    As long as it wasn’t sent before the event I would appreciate the promptness.

    Post # 4
    8681 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper

    I think the only time it would be premature was if you hadn’t received the gift yet!

    Post # 5
    3451 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: September 2012

    I don’t think so.

    Post # 6
    2425 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: May 2012

    I sent all my thank yous ASAP, meaning gifts I got before the wedding I sent the thank yous before the wedding. After we sent them, Mother-In-Law heard back from one of DH’s aunts that she couldn’t believe we opened the wedding gift they sent us before the wedding (which they sent 6 weeks before the wedding!) Itt came in a huge box from Bed Bath and Beyond, and what were we supposed to do, just let our living room get buried in shipping boxes in the months leading up to our wedding? We live in an apartment, don’t have the room for that! lol Funny thing is that Aunt sent the wedding gift with the “shower” gift, which obviously was intended for before the wedding, but there was no way to tell which was which until we opened them!

    So some people apparently think you shouldn’t open wedding gifts before the wedding, but I just don’t think that’s practical. I opened them, and sent my thank yous immediately and am happy I did!

    Post # 7
    1925 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: May 2013

    I agree, it’s always nice to receive a thank you note at all, but I really like it when I receive them quickly.  🙂

    Post # 8
    625 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: August 2012

    It’s not the timing you have to watch for but the wording. If it came really soon but mentioned something that sounded pretty personal to me, I’d be happy. If it sounded like a cookie cutter thank you that wasn’t even attempted to be tailored to my gift, I’d be a little bummed.

    But as someone who just finished her thank you cards TONIGHT (a month after the wedding) I advise all brides-to-be to write your thank you cards ASAP, like right after you get the gift. Wait too long and its a whole lot of “wait a minute… who the heck bought us this oven set?” It was not a pretty sight, and if you want to make them all personal, it’s a long frikken process! 🙁

    Post # 10
    11418 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: May 2009

    Not in the way you are defining it. Until I read your post, I was going to say that, for me, there was such a thing as too soon, because I had ordered gorgeous, engraved, Crane “informals” with our formal social titles on them, and I obviously could not use them until after my wedding.  As a result, I did not keep up with my thank you notes as the wedding gifts arrived in the months prior to our wedding, since I wanted to send out the engraved notes with my new social title on them.

    I sent embossed notes featuring my former (then current) monogram to acknowledge our shower gifts, however.

    Post # 11
    3267 posts
    Sugar bee

    Prompt thanking is the height of politeness. 

    Thank yous should be sent out before you go to bed on the night the gift was received.

    Post # 12
    13251 posts
    Honey Beekeeper
    • Wedding: November 1999

    I’m usually excited to get a thank you card, end of story.  So many people don’t do them these days that it’s a nice surprise…so I’d never raise an eyebrow after receiving one two days after an event versus two weeks.  Promptness is polite! 🙂

    Post # 13
    2363 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: October 2012

    @ChemistryBride:  One of my mom’s friends was similarly upset to receive a thank you note before the wedding, but not because she thought it was rude that I opened her gift.  She just assumed that Macy’s would not actually ship the gift until after the wedding.

    Post # 14
    2781 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: October 2013

    As long as they are after the fact, I don’t see a problem. But mailing them too soon might make people feel you sent them before the event actually took place, and therefore the thank you isn’t as sincere.

    Post # 15
    7561 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper
    • Wedding: January 2013

    As soon as you receive a gift, send out that thank you note!

    Post # 16
    2281 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: June 2012

    There is no such thing as too soon. Not possible. 

    The topic ‘is there such a thing as sending a thank you card too soon?’ is closed to new replies.

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