Post # 1
My partner and I were having a good day and we were just watching videos.He had asked if i wanted a muffin and I said yes. He gave me half and I thought to myself…wheres the other half as he had cut them in half to toast. Anyway i ate it and didnt say anything. Later when I suggested what we could have for dinner..he said that sounds ok…then an hour later he said when are you making that dinner,,I said sure ill make it but I hadnt said earlier that I would make it….I had only suggested we could have it. he said..yes you did and also added that I have no idea what I say half the time. Anyway..I got up and started to make it for him and thought I’d make the joke about only receiving half the muffin ealier..So I said i a very joking way…Hey..so wheres my other half of my mufifn and then I laughed. He said I gave you a whole one..I replied, no hunni it was half and told him what i had thought back when he gave it to me and i also remebered looking at his plate and he had 3 halves on it…And made a metal note. So thats how I remebered so clearly…he said shut up and stop banging on as id rather listen to the tv then you. I thought we were still joking around. So I went over and put my right hand over his mouth from behind him so he would sop telling me to shut up so I could speak. He grabbed my arms and squeezed them and pushed me away…i was taken back but thought he was joking so I did it agian and I was laughing. He grabbed my wrists even tighter…so tight that it was very painful and then pushed me back again and i hit the cabnit behind me and he had pushed my left hand in to my left breast and that really hurt too….and in a very angry voice said fuck off. I said I thought we were joking and he said well clearly im not. I told him that he had really hurt me and to never do it agin. He said stop banging on I didnt hurt you..and I said yes you did..you will see whn the bruised come. Then he went off telling me again to F off and that I was a twat and a bitch and many oter things…so I walked off and called him an arsehole. I havent spoken to him since and that was the night before last. Myarms are both very sore. My right one hurts to do anything with . So im trying not to use it. Im going to the doctors today but dont want to tell the doctor what happened so ill make something up. It is a bit swollen but i think theres more damage inside then on the out even though there is bruiseing but its hard to see as I have fake tan on….but i can see them…I just wanted advice as Im unsure if im over reacting as I feel that it was pysical abuse but he hasnt apolised or said anything so it makes me thing that he doesnt think he has done any wrong. Please tell me what you think. Sorry for long story with maybe to many details but i want to point out how it started as a joke and im unsure how he got so angry that he hurt me..not just once but twice…Thanks
Post # 3
Yes, it’s abuse and you absolutely must tell your doctor the truth. Has he spoken to you so disrespectfully before?
Post # 4
Generally, if you have to even ask, then yes it is abuse in some form. Is this the first time he has acted like this?
In my life I have lived by two rules I expect my boyfriends/husband to live by. that is no name calling and no physical touching with the intent to harm me. He did both. In my book that is not OK and I would not accept it.
Post # 5
Yes abuse abuse abuse…get away from him. He sounds like no good. You deserve better and no one should EVER put their hands on you.
Post # 6
That’s all kinds of abuse there..
Verbal for calling you just awful names and Physical for what he did to your arm and wrist not to mention emotional abuse for having to deal with it at all
I’m sorry this happened to you but if I were you I would leave him before he hurts you worse.
I was in an abusive relationship that started out as “joking” and then got to the point where he would only bruise me where my clothes would cover it..
Get out while you can
Post # 7
Scaring you and hurting you IS abuse. No matter what he says before, during, or after.
Please get help. Do you have family or friends you can stay with?
Post # 8
- Wedding: August 2013 - Rocky Mountains USA
That is most definitely verbal and physical abuse. If he’ll insult and injure you so easily over you just asking him about a muffin, imagine what he’s capable of when he’s actually truly pissed off about something. This is not a healthy or safe relationship from what you’ve described. Every woman deserves a partner who respects and loves them enough to NEVER, not even once, do what he did. Please leave ASAP! It can only get worse, especially since he seemed so nonchalant about the whole thing
Post # 9
Physical abuse and verbal abuse.
Tell your doctor the truth. If it’s not abuse then there’s no harm in telling the truth. The fact that you want to lie to the doctor means you know it’s wrong.
Post # 10
That’s abuse. Get help now. Go stay with a friend or family member.
Post # 11
Please here me out, you in no way deserved anything that he did to you and what he did is abuse in every way.
I’m just urgeing you to be carefull, you should never ever cross the touch barrier during a disagreement. When you put your hand over his mouth, it seemed like he felt challenged. So please, during any interaction you have with him in the future, I urge you not to touch him.
You should leave as soon as you can.
Post # 12
@helpmetoknowhwtsbest: RUN away Fast… nothing good comes from a relationship like that trust me i kno
Post # 13
So many red flags here! Think back long and hard. Is this really the first instance?
Post # 14
Like PPs have said, yes! That is abuse and in many different forms, physical and emotional. I suggest cooling down and then having a conversation with your SO.
Personally, I would never stand for someone ever doing that to me. Whether it was a partner, SO, Fiance or husband!
This sends a huge red flag up, and I strongly suggest rethinking this relationship.
A post was beautifully written today about not being afraid to end it and leave. Yes, it is scary, yes it will be hard, and yes it will hurt, but it will be so worth it when this person is no longer in your life hurting you both emotionally and physically.
Post # 15
YES! In more ways than one that is ABUSE!
Post # 16
- Wedding: March 2012 - Pelican Grand Beach Resort
It is abuse and you should not lie to your doctor.