(Closed) Is this considered verbal abuse ? Serious question here.

posted 5 years ago in Relationships
Post # 211
5951 posts
Bee Keeper

ksn1219:  Thanks for letting me know 🙁  Poor girl, I hope her silence is because she packed up herself & her kids and went somewhere safe and hasn’t had the chance to visit this site. So sad that things were even worse her last post. Leaving can be difficult, but a lifetime of this would be far worse.

Post # 212
530 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2014

ksn1219:  things have probably been bad for a long time.  My guess is that the OP’s husband has been physical before and that she isn’t comfortable admitting it to others (even anonymously on weddingbee). 

I really hope that the OP realizes that she has done nothing wrong, that she doesn’t deserve this, and that if she leaves him (with good planning) he will never hurt her again.  Even better, if she leaves him, she will see how strong she is and how much better life can be without him in it. 

Post # 213
697 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2016

I couldn’t even finish reading this post once I got to the halfway point. This is absolutely emotional abuse!!! I am a relationship coach as my profession and that behaviour is not something that should be tolerated or made acceptable in any way, shape or form. From what I’ve read from your post, it sounds to me like he just wants you to do what he wants and to be compliant. It’s about control for him and overpowering you to make himself feel powerful and in control of any given situation. So my question is, at what point in his life or in his childhood did he feel powerless and is triggering this type of behaviour in him? Your husband SHOULD NOT be treating you that way. A man is supposed to honor and cherish you mentally, emotionally, and physically and if he is not than he needs to either get himself some help to deal with his issues and insecurities or you need to leave him if he is not willing to do so. End of story. This is not what a healthy relationship looks like and you deserve far better then what he is giving you.

Post # 214
234 posts
Helper bee

I also hope the OP realizes that if she stays, she’s complicit in emotional harm to her children. It’s not just about her anymore.

Post # 215
982 posts
Busy bee

thisbeehides:  definitely definitely definitely. And I am afraid that it will escalate to physical. The punching of the couch you are laying on, threatening to break things, saying he will kill you…it doesn’t matter how sweet he is when he’s not flying off the handle. What matters is that when he’s at his worst, he is dangerous. These are his true colours. 

Regardless, verbal abuse can be extremely damaging because it leaves a scar no one can see.

i know this post was a while ago, but you really need to consider whether you want to live the rest of your life in this dictatorship, walking on eggshells so as not to set him off (as you know, you don’t even need to do anything to set him off). It’s a dangerous situation for you.


Post # 216
1095 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: December 2015

thisbeehides:  bee are you ok? Please update us I’m worried 

The topic ‘Is this considered verbal abuse ? Serious question here.’ is closed to new replies.

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