Post # 1
Another thread on cutting costs got me thinking…. Do I really have to tip each vendor on my wedding day? I’ve heard of people giving ALL their vendors 20-30% cash tips. Is this customary/expected?
Here’s a few specific examples I thought of….
My on-site coordinator is included in our venue’s wedding package. The venue charges 22% gratuity on EVERYTHING, including the package itself. Also, she hasn’t even been that helpful. I wouldn’t even know how much to tip her. It just seems pointless/excessive to me.
Next, our DJ charges $1200, which I feel is pretty high. He’s the owner of the company, so that money all goes directly to him. I love him and he’s great, but do I really need to pay him another $240-360 cash??
Lastly, our reverend charges $500 (this is on top of the $1200 ceremony fee + 22% gratuity that our venue is charging). She’s local, so there’s no travel time involved. Also, she’s not writing our ceremony. She gave us a binder with different prayers, introductions, readings, etc. and told us to type up our ceremony the way we wanted it in MS Word and email it to her… She said she likes to meet with all her couples before the wedding to go over everything, so I emailed her in August and she said it was too soon. I later set up another appointment for this weekend that she cancelled, becuase she’s just “so busy with all the Fall weddings.” So no meeting. Our ceremony will also be very short and her fee doesn’t include a rehearsal. So basically, she’ll be making about $17 PER MINUTE to stand there and read a script that I’m writing for her (and sign our license). I feel like that’s more than enough.
Sorry, I realize this might all seem a little snarky and flame-worthy… I’m just wondering if everyone really does tip ALL their vendors that much cash on the day of. Is it incredibly tacky not to? Can’t I just write a nice thank you card?
Post # 3
I couldn’t possibly tip 30%…I really feel a tip in merit based. Vendors set there prices based on what they think they should earn for their services. If they go ABOVE and BEYOND your expections, then tip….I don’t feel it should be expected or a certain percentage.
Post # 4
I personally I agree with you. Granted, I haven’t had my wedding yet, and haven’t been to many. But I agree that the costs are ridiculous to begin with, so why pay even more?
Post # 5
Referral business and good reviews go a long way too!
Post # 6
I think it’s ridiculous, too. I’m definitely not tipping my vendors anywhere close to the ‘recommended’ amounts. As a former waitress, I understand the logic behind tipping servers, but tipping expectations have gotten ridiculous. They inflate their prices for weddings already- that’s enough!
Post # 7
A) The vendor included tip, that is done
B) The DJ must get a tip
C) The charge for the reverend is more a donation/suggestion and a tip on top of that is not needed
So, in my book, I got you out of 2/3
Post # 8
- Wedding: September 2011 - Clark Gardens
You only need to tip anyone who does NOT own their own business. DJ who owns the company, for example, would not expect a tip. Bartenders, waiters, floral delivery people, etc. are the types of people who would be very happy if you tipped them.
Post # 9
Highwire: In that case you would never tip a salon owner…
Post # 10
Firstly I would never ever pay 30%, i tipped all my vendors 15% max and if i really loved them then i went above and beyond. I would do the same.
Etiquette rules are that if the gratuity is included you dont have to pay extra and if they own the buisness.
As someone who is just starting out, owning my own wedding buisness and doing DOC work, do I like a tip, absolutley…who wouldnt. What i like about it though is that when i get it it gives me that extra boost of confidence…like “hey i did such a good job, they tipped me!” So with that in mind…no tip and a stellar review instead would be just as great, if not BETTER then getting money.
Post # 11
I only tipped my DOC. She is the only one I felt really deserved it. I wasn’t about to tip the DJ who I paid $600 for 4 hours of work.
EDIT: I lied, I tipped my hair and makeup people too.
Post # 12
- Wedding: September 2011 - Clark Gardens
@megbon12: The owner of the salon, no. A hair stylist who works in the salon, yes.
Post # 13
I wouldn’t tip anyone who didn’t go above and beyond owner or not. My venue is charging tip for the servers. My photographer and DJ, I am already paying based on the service they provide, and I really csna’t see them excedding my expectations on the thousands of dollars we are already paying…
Post # 14
I dont really want to tip anyone…
But if someone does a good job I will…
Prices are high to begin with, and then people EXPECT additional $$$ just because…. No… it needs to be earned
Post # 15
@Captain013: I feel the same way. Even if they do an amazing job, I’m already paying them quite a bit…I know they have expenses to cover, but they set the rate for their services. I’m sort of in the “only for those who go above and beyond” camp, although it may not be proper etiquette.
Also, I actually tried to tip my hair and makeup person for the trial, and she applied it to my balance for the day-of services. I didn’t realize that some vendors may not accept tips as a policy.
Post # 16
I actually did not end up giving any extra tips aside from hair/MU. I did not tip my photog ($3k) or my DJ ($1400). They did great, but they were owners which I read you do not need to tip, and I think they charged plenty already. My DOC was part of the venue who was already charging service charge and gratuity on the food and drink prices. As an after thought, my hair/MU person were their own business/owner also, so I’m not sure they required/expected a tip, but I read you always tip them so I went with it.