(Closed) Is this is a bad/rude idea?

posted 6 years ago in Parties
Post # 3
454 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2012

@sushitushi:  I know it would probably upset my mom if she weren’t invited, could you do a dinner with everyone first and then have your party? That way they could feel like they had quality time with the whole family and then the younger people could do their own party afterwards. Just an idea 🙂

Post # 4
3773 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: December 1999

I am sorry,but I think the whole thing is a bad idea. Is there any way you could do this anytime sooner then the night before the wedding? If you want to play drinking games and get wasted, it opens the door to a whole load of complications.

As far as inviting the older women, I don’t think it is rude to not invite them, especially if you have a rehersal earlier in the day.

Post # 5
1189 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: March 2010

I had a shower two days before my wedding with a bachelorette party to follow. We just did a shower in one location with all of the ladies, older and younger, and then the younger girls went to the next part to open “sassy” gifts and then go out and hit the town. Couldy you split it up that way somehow? Also, I second not doing it the night before your wedding–in all honesty, even two nights before mine was rough, but I had so many out of town guests that it was the only way they could attend.

Post # 6
1830 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

@ieatunicorns:   Yeah, I agree.  The night before your wedding sounds like terrible timing to have a bachelorette party where everyone is going to be drinking a lot, staying up late, and doing who knows what.  Trust me, you will WANT to feel refreshed and well rested on your wedding day – I can’t imagine anything worse than feeling hungover on such an important day when you need to be on top of your game.

I think you’re perfectly within your right to not invite the older ladies (my mom and my aunts didn’t come to my bachelorette party) and that’s fine.  I would, however, say that if all these people are travelling to be at your wedding, I think you should make a point to spend as much time with all of them as you can.  Running off on the night before your wedding to have a get together with your bridesmaids doesn’t seem very nice to me, aside from the fact that I don’t think it’s a good idea to have that kind of party the night before your wedding anyway.   I’d reconsider the evening and plan a casual get together for all of your out of town guests – they will appreciate it.


Post # 7
7902 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: March 2012 - Pelican Grand Beach Resort

I also second moving it if possible.  Getting drunk the night before the wedding is a big beauty no. You don’t want to be bloated and puffyon the face on your wedding day, and you don’t want your BMs to be either. 

Id try tofigure out a way to invite the older ladies to the shower part. 

Post # 9
4150 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

Is there any other time you can do it?  I agree with PPs – planning to stay up late and get drunk the night before your wedding sounds disastrous.  I think you’ll want to feel refreshed, well-rested and beautiful on your wedding day, and a bachelorette party the night before is probably not the best recipe for that.  As far as inviting the older ladies, I don’t think you need to.  We had a shower for my friend and that night the young girls went on to the bachelorette party and it wasn’t weird at all.

Post # 11
955 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2014

The biggest red flag I see is getting wild and wasted the night before your wedding. You want to be well rested–not to mention beautiful and at your very best–on your big day, right?

I say include the older ladies in your shower. Even dinner would be appropriate. Leaving them out all together is a no-no In My Humble Opinion.

Post # 12
1735 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

I think its fine not to invite them.  Its a bacherlorette party and thats no place for grandma.

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