(Closed) Is this normall….

posted 6 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
1473 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

I’m a little over 5 months out and I feel like that too sometimes. But then I think about it really hard and I think of all of the reasons why I love him and want to spend my life with him. It puts it into perspective. Good luck!

Post # 4
Member
399 posts
Helper bee

God, I hope its normal…. all my friends keep telling me it is ๐Ÿ™‚

Post # 5
Member
1697 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

I had cold feet right after we first got engaged. I had some MAJOR freak out sessions. I considered it normal. This is a big step, and if you need to question it go ahead and question it…just make sure the answer is a resounding YES! DO IT! and that there are no tepid feelings about it. It helped to talk to all my married friends about it.

Post # 6
Member
972 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2012

I’ve had a little of that also. I think it’s normal. It IS a huge commitment. I freak out when I make any big decisions, buying a car, e-ring, black or white Ipad. So I think it would be normal to freak out over something like a marriage

Post # 7
Member
98 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

The “young love” feeling won’t last forever, that is something I’m prepared for.  A wise man once told me that the best feeling in the world was just squeezing his wife’s hand for 10 seconds when they’re reading together at night time before bed.  THAT is what I want.  I always ask myself some questions when I start wondering about my FH.  Can we stand living with eachother for 95% of the year?  Does he make me happy at least once a day?  Do we agree on the BIG life decisions, (religions, children, locations, familes, etc.)  Will he be a good father?  Do I trust him?  Can he trust me?  Do we help eachother?  Is he sympathetic on bad days and happy for me on the good days?  And last but not least, when I show him my *ahem* bits, does he smile?  If all those are “YES!” then marry the dang guy!  I see a marriage as much more than just a fluttery little attracted feeling, which I think many young people mistake for true love.  It’s important to have had that feeling at one point, but if you dont’ feel it every 3 seconds, it just means your love is changing and maturing. 

That’s my take on it anyways.  ๐Ÿ˜‰

Oh, and if you fight all the time and have a BIG disagreement between the 2 of you, (not just toothpaste brands, but like, where you see yourselves in 10 years,) then dont’ do it.

But DO IT!  ๐Ÿ™‚

Post # 9
Member
1723 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

@Mrs.Jansen:  I know your scaared but its very normal. My gf was in love with her man so much but the moment he proposed and she accepted — she said she started havin the cold feet and really disliked him for a while and realized it was al just nerves.

Im about 5 months away and Im nervous myself. Im nervous if I would be able to make him happy- not the other way around, but we can make it through girl, just trust your heart (:

Post # 10
Member
1371 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

I’m glad I read this post, because I have moments of panic also.  So nice to know it’ s not just me going through this!

Post # 11
Member
5883 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: October 2010

It’s very normal. You just have to ask if you are having doubts about him- is he the right one? Will xxx change? Can I live with xxx if he doesn’t change? Those are all signs that you shouldn’t get married. But if you are having doubts about the enormity of “forever” and worried if you can do it- perfectly healthy. It sounds like you are having the same doubts I did- I used to say I have no doubts about him. I know he the perfect guy for me. I have doubts about marriage in general- is it possible in this day and age for any two people to make it for 20,30,40 years?

There’s a web site that some people recommend called Conscience Transitions.

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