Post # 1
So i know customs and ettiquette etc are different in the US and UK and this is a predominantly US site so im not sure if what me and my Fiance are planning is acceptable but its all we want to do and all we can afford tbh but i would love your opinions.
Just a bit of background, we will both be 25, we just bought a house and we have a child who will be 5 and a half by this time and planning more children so we dont have a lot of spare money to save for a wedding. We’re giving ourselves 17 months to plan and save so we can get the best deals and shop around and my mother is also giving us a little bit of money towards my dress, shoes, hair and makeup. so here is our plan for the day.
We will be getting married at the town hall (registry office) at around 2pm then taking all of our guests (around 40 people) out for drinks at a nearby pub or club (whichever can get us a private area to celebrate in) and we will all have a few drinks together.
Then we are having a night time party at a villiage club or a hired hall which we will decorate nicely with bunting and balloons etc. There will be a buffet that my family is going to do for us (my family is huge and all want to help so im putting them on sandwich duty, plus they always do the most amazing buffets for birthday parties etc) there is a bar in the hall we are thinking of having and guests will be buying their own drinks (standard here in the uk although i know this can be tacky from a US point of view) We arent having a DJ but we are having an iPod party (hiring massive speakers and lights to connect the ipod to and sorting the playlist ourselves) so im sure people will be dancing and having a good time which is all we really want.
I am doing the cake myself (im a baker on the side of my regular job so it makes sense and it will be cheaper) an 8″ round cake with about 100 cupcakes to match which will double as dessert.
We are also having a sweetie buffet getting lots of different sized jars and giant martini glasses and filling them with sweet which we can get from a wholesalers to cut costs and our favours are going to be pic n mix bags personalised with our names and wedding date and then everybody can take some sweets home with them and remember our wedding.
Does it sound like were cutting too many corners by not having a sit down meal etc? The ceremony only starts at 2pm so most sensible people would have lunch before coming and we would include on the invites that after the ceremony is drinks before the night do so people wouldnt expect a sit down meal. My family are great at buffets so i dont see the point in paying somebody else to do it when they charge ridiculous prices for minimal food (and both our families eat a lot lol). Im just worried that people will pass judgement and think we are being too cheap, what do you reckon?
Post # 3
- Wedding: August 2013 - The Liberty House
I think this sounds great. You are definitely providing enough food and I’m sure your guests will have a blast
Post # 4
as long as the buffet your family is doing will have food for dinner, then i think it sounds good. i don’t think weddings always have a formal dinner, especially if the day is more laid back like yours sounds like. as long as nobody is hungry and is fed with some real food it should be fine.
Post # 5
I think this sound like a great idea:)
Post # 6
- Wedding: September 2013 - Creek club at ion, SC
Hey – im British and at this time, youll probably find many more
Yes it is DEFINITELY more acceptable to do this in the UK than in the US. Just some suggetions – I would put some nibbles down at the pub, ask your family to do a more than just sandwiches – something more wedding-y (maybe research it together – buffets can definitely be wedding-y) and if you have a little bit spare I would put a little money behind the bar o that, say you have £75 behind there (only have 40 guests so could just buy a few bottles of something from behind the bar), everyone can get one drink from the bride and groom.
Post # 7
Oh they will be doing a FULL buffet, all different kinds of food including indian and chinese nibbles too there will be tonnes of food and lots of different meats and choices for everybody.
@leecy87: Thats a good idea to have some nibbles in the pub i haddnt thought of that and we will be putting £100 behind the bar for drinks there because we will be there for a good two hours i reckon. The night do will start at 6pm and nobody wants to speeches or anything so the dancing/food will be open for everybody after around half an hour to an hour to let all of our other guests (friends and work colleagues) to arrive
Post # 8
I think it’s perfectly fine, sounds great actually 🙂 And I agree that nibblies in the pub is a good idea 🙂
Post # 9
- Wedding: September 2013 - Creek club at ion, SC
@sapphirecupcake: Then it sounds great!! There is nothing wrong with a buffet, im getting married in the us and have chosen a fancy buffet instead of a sit down meal.
Post # 10
Phew i was thinking all sorts of terrible things earlier like familys wouldnt approve and people would think it was too cheap but if they know us and love us surely it shouldnt matter right? thanks ladies youve really helped to put my mind at ease x
Post # 11
Your guests are getting food and cake. That’s seems like enough. You guys are starting your new life together and no one wants you to go into debt to celebrate your day. Its smart.
Post # 12
It sounds great to me, especially the family buffet! You could consider, in lieu of the cash bar, just doing beer/wine, if it fits in the budget and if your family/friends are a beer/wine crowd.
Post # 13
I think it sounds awesome and I’m in the USA! It sounds like a great time to me, but I’m not one for the stuffy “should do…” :). You do what you guys want! Worst case people will always remember it because it was “different”. It’d be boring if we were all the same!
This coming from someone with a backyard small wedding and everyone went on about how they loved it and it was great and so us. We got most of the major bits in on a smaller scale, and some just plain fun “us” stuff. Maybe we were lucky in the reaction, but if it comes down to it: do you want to do what you guys want or what you think others expect? 🙂 I vote for what you want and can afford!
Post # 14
I’m from lLiverpool and I think it’s a lovely idea! People understand how pricey weddings are and they expect a lot less, especially from young couples. Your idea sounds lovely, however if you feel worried why not fancy it up a bit? You could copy so,e of the posh M&S style finger food that costs a bomb if you buy premade but you could do reasonably if you have good cooks and are buying in bulk. I definitely recommend Costco. We had a large party a few months ago and some of their food is amazing, we bought loads of anti pasti style tapas meats and sausages which were unusual and went down a storm, plus loads of unusual types of seafood, breads and salad items you might not get in other places. It’s amazing for sweets too, ESP jelly beans! Good luck, it sounds amazing!
Post # 15
Sounds fantastic. You are providing food. You are providing music. And you’re having a small guest list, so you won’t have the people who are there for the free food and drink, and who will whisper in corners – you’ll only have people who want to celebrate your special day, and will be happy to be there for you. It sounds like a great day.