(Closed) Is this rude? I dont want to hurt anyones feelings.

posted 8 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
Member
400 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2010

I think that the others might be slightly offended.

Post # 4
Member
2474 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

I don’t think it’s rude at all.  Many actual rehearsal dinners include not only the bridal party and close family, but also the out of town guests.  It’s just something to show your appreciation for your guests who have to make a bigger effort to be with you on your wedding day.  I don’t think the in-towners will be offended – or at least they shouldn’t be.

Post # 5
Member
2207 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2010

It is totally fine, and rather normal now a days. Do invite your officiant and attendants, thoguh, to the BBQ.

Sounds like fun, good luck!

Post # 6
Member
426 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2009

hmmmm. Im not sure..  I don’t know your “in-towners” but I do know my family and I know a few of them that would be calling my Mom “crying” or being over dramatic.  THats just the way some of them are.  They can be dramatic and gossipy.  

In that case it wouldn’t work for me to have it on my wedding website.  I would have to simply send out private invites just to the out of town guests.  

YOu know your family and friends best – so just think about how some of them might feel if they noticed it on your website…….

Post # 7
Member
1110 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: March 2009

I dont think its rude.

Post # 8
Member
4480 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: March 2010 - Calamigos Ranch

I’d leave it off the website and just send an invitation.

Post # 9
Member
7152 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2010

I don’t think it’s rude at all.

Post # 10
Member
838 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

Its not rude its a gathering for your Out of Town guest. I wouldnt take it personal.

Post # 11
Member
6597 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: August 2010

I don’t think it is rude but I would also take it off the wedding website and just send out an invitation!

Post # 12
Member
944 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2009

I’m on the fence about if it’s right or not.  I agree though, I’d take it off the website because what if an “in-towner” skims and doesn’t read like some people tend to do and shows up?  I’d make a pretty postcard and send it out.

Post # 13
Member
1230 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2010

I don’t think it’s rude to invite the out of towners and not the people in town but I would take it off the website and just send an invitation to the people.

Post # 14
Member
753 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

I agree about taking it off the website, however I don’t think it’s rude.  I have been to a lot of weddings where people do their rehearsal dinners that way.

Post # 15
Member
287 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

we originally had all the Out of Town events – friday cocktails, sunday brunch – on the “wedding events” page but my mom didn’t like this. so we created a separate page for out of towners and took it off the general schedule page. i thought this was a good compromise. we are also putting an insert about the events in the invites for our of towners. we are about 75% OOTer anyway.

i think people understand that OOTers get invited to different things. that’s just how it is. although we are including some local family (a few cousins) in the Out of Town group even though they aren’t because they are family and we want to include them.

Post # 16
Member
14185 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2009

a rehearsal dinner is typically just FOR people from out of town AND bridal party. That’s not unusual to me and i’d send out invites.

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