Post # 1
I haven’t really posted much on here, I guess I am a waiting bee. My boyfriend and I have been together for 5 years, have lived together for 4 years and just bought a house togethers.
We are planning on getting engaged very soon and have been talking about an October 2014 wedding.
Now, my boyfriends brother and his girlfriend have just gotten engaged on the weekend, they are younger than us but have been together for almost 7 years. I am so, so happy for them . However they are planning to get married in November 2014.
I figured that if we got married in October it would be too close to their wedding so I was thinking we could do it in late August/early September but my boyfriend thinks that is still too close and that we should wait until after them because they got engaged first. We are in Australia and I really don’t want to get married in Summer, it’s just way too hot, I have always wanted to get married in late winter or spring and I don’t really want to have to wait a whole nother year until September/October 2015.
Obviously we won’t bring anything about wedding dates up with them until we are officially engaged but I just wanted to see what you guys think.
Do you think it would be disrespectful if we got married 2+ months before them?
Post # 3
September would be just fine, even early October depending how many out of town guests you have.
Post # 4
So you think it’s ok if we get married first even though they are engaged first? Or is this against wedding etiquette?
Post # 5
In my opinion, which may be different from others, so long as it’s not a week before their wedding I would say it’s fine for friends and a month for siblings would be okay.
The best thing to do would to have a very open conversation about it to your brother and his fiance to know how they feel about it because that’s what matters most. I definitely wouldn’t want to schedule a wedding right before my siblings’ if it had any chance of upsetting them. If they are okay with it then go for it, if not you can work it out.
Post # 6
2 months is perfect. There’s no rule that first couple engaged needs to be first to get married. What if they wanted a 2 year engagement and you wanted to elope immediately? Planning a sibling wedding with 2 months in between is more than courteous.
Post # 7
Thanks for the reassurance guys, will have to talk about it more with my boyfriend and when the time comes hopefully his brother and fiance are cool about it too.
Post # 8
@monique_w: I admire and commend you on the fact that you are being so considerate of your boyfriend’s brother. I think you are totally fine to do it as long as it’s not within the month. I know other bees will tell you “you only get one day” but to be considerate of family you should never pick the same month. So, I think you are fine by putting a little more space in between!