(Closed) Is this too much to ask of the guests?

posted 7 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 32
Member
5472 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: August 2012

We had to provide similar information to attend a wedding on a cruise ship (even though we were not cruising) and we had to go through security and the whole shebang.  If we wanted to go, we complied.  If it were too much we would have declined.

Post # 33
Member
4329 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: November 2019 - Canada

@HonoraryNerd:  I wouldnt be bothered if I was asked to provide that info to attend a wedding on a base, I would prefer to produce ID when I arrived instead of providing it beforehand though. I think your main concern will be the fact that it will be hard enough to get your guests to RSVP, nevermind provide all the additional information too. I think you have to “read your crowd” on this one.

Post # 34
Member
1077 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2014 - Greenbrier Country Club

I live in a military town, so I am very used to this idea. I would also have no problem proving that information.
However, be prepared for more push back from guests then usual. 
As a guest, I wouldn’t like having to deal with the hassel (but would), and I would much rather go to a venue not on base.

Post # 35
Member
1274 posts
Bumble bee

It may be a little different then a typical rsvp card, but I wouldn’t have a problem with it if I was attending a friend or family member’s wedding. Before getting all cray cray about it though, maybe check it out and see if it would work for you guys and your visions. Just give them a quick call to ease your mind first and ask if your guests will need to provide their full name and license in advance so they have a list or if they will just need to show ID at the gate. Because that’s a big difference. 

Post # 36
Member
10449 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: February 2014

As a guest this wouldn’t bother me at all. It’s your DL number, so what? 

BUT I think this will be a huge hassle for you. It’s bad enough chasing people down for a yes/no, but asking for extra information on top of that will probably make it way more difficult. 

Post # 37
Member
1772 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2014

whatever you do, don’t ask for this information on the back of an rsvp card- nobody looks at the back of rsvp cards b/c it’s assumed they’re always 1-sided.  ppl barely even follow instructions/read the front of the card . . .

good luck though

Post # 38
Member
5656 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: August 2012

I wouldn’t do this because whoever the on base sponsor is then is responsible for the behavior of 200 people while on base. Which has much bigger consequences than they would at a civilian venue.

Post # 39
Member
1678 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

@HonoraryNerd:  i think this will just be a headache – you’ll drive yourself crazy trying to track down all the info. people don’t read carefully enough!

Post # 40
Member
864 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2014

I don’t get the problem. It’s not like your asking for teir credit card or sicial security numbers. what will anybody be able to do with your driver’s license number? (I am asking in honesty – I am German and it wouldn’t help you for anything, knowing my fL number.) 

especially with all the revelations of the NSA, the least thing i would worry about is your government having your do number. Hell, they probably know the color of your underwear right now. 

If the savings are not substantial, I probably wouldn’t bother going through the hassle of train all the required info if people will be slow to RSVP. If you can save quite a bit: I don’t see howa nybody  would miss a wedding of someone important because they didn’t wanna share their freaking DL number … 

Post # 41
Member
1632 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

Why would the base need the DL before the event? Couldn’t guests just show up with their ID?

Needing to provide this before hand would turn me off and make me worried about how my info was being used.

Post # 42
Member
784 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

@HonoraryNerd:  I personally wouldn’t have an issue since it is for a good reason, but it seems like that isn’t true for your family, who are the people that actually matter.  Could they still get in on the day of if they don’t respond with the correct information?  Are there any family members (children, etc) that would have issues because they don’t have a valid ID?

Post # 43
Member
920 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2015

hmm I think that’s asking too much personally. 

Post # 44
Member
4192 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: July 2012 - Baltimore Museum of Industry

OP, I would double check that the driver’s license information is needed beforehand. I went to a wedding on a military base recently- at the check point, my Mom and I both had to show our IDs, not beforehand. (Not sure if there was a list they checked or not)

It’s not unreasonable to stress to your guests- no ID, no admittance.

Post # 45
Member
354 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

I have been to a wedding at a base officer’s club. I needed to show my driver’s license and husband had to show is (we were on a big bus) and that was it. That’s all that should be needed.

I would not give YOU my DL number, but I’d happily show it at to base security. You may have to provide a guest/vendor list beforehand, but that should be it. My friends did have a vendor that, despite being told numerous times they needed ID, did not bring theirs. The groom had to go back to the gate and vouch for them. So you do need to be very explicit. Word of mouth, insert cards, website, etc.

Post # 46
Member
1149 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: March 2015

@HonoraryNerd:  Wouldn’t bother me! I dont see an issue with handing over my information to people who are obviously close enough friends that i’m invited to their wedding..

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