(Closed) Is unconditional love only possible between a parent and child?

posted 5 years ago in Family
Post # 2
Member
5365 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: May 2016

I work in juvenile probation and see parents who don’t love their children unconditionally so I don’t think it applies in that relationship either.

Post # 3
Member
2348 posts
Buzzing bee

Mlim:  There are loads of parents who don’t love or act lovingly to their children. 

Post # 4
Member
1019 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2014

I don’t think it exists at all.

Post # 5
Member
11462 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: May 2009

I personally believe that unconditional love is only CONSISTENTLY found in God. I believe that, with God’s help and a whole lot of “dying” to self, people can learn to show unconditional love at times, but usually there is something that eventually will put that love to the test at some point in the relationship.

I would love to be able to love my husband and stepchildren unconditionally. I am committed to them, so, in that sense, I love them unconditionally. However, there are many times when conflict has left me feeling hurt or upset about something, and I do not consistently demonstrate unconditional love at all times in those relationships.

Post # 6
Member
7416 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2014

Not even dogs love unconditionally. Kick a dog long enough and it will bite or run away. Dogs have much higher thresholds than people.

Post # 7
Member
3064 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

Mlim:  I feel like I have unconditional love for my siblings and my immediate family and my dog. I would also love to say I have unconditional love for my husband but TBH if he was to have an affair or something it would change how I felt about him. If god forbid my siblings/parents did something horrible I think part of me would still love them .

Post # 8
Member
1084 posts
Bumble bee

Im a therapist. There are plenty of children who are not loved unconditionally by their parents…and even worse, who have had violent acts of hatred and cruelty conducted on them by their parents. 

blood relations do not equate unconditional love.

Post # 9
Member
5188 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: February 2013

Mlim:  The way I see it, a child doesn’t have to earn your love. It’s pure ‘love at first sight’. With a romantic partner it takes time and actions. The connection is there, but it’s not the same connection you would have with a child, who depends on your love. 

Post # 10
Member
953 posts
Busy bee

I think it depends on the person.

My mother was not meant to be a mother.  The thought of unconditional love from her is laughable. As an adult I asked my father if she even acted attached to me at all while I was an infant. He claims yes she loved me…but from my earliest memories it never seemed like it. 

But I love my children unconditionally,  I loved them before they were born. One of my children has done bad things.  I know it, I am angry with him but I love him. I will always be here for my children.  They can cheat, steal, kill and I of course will be angry and hurt but I will never turn my back on them. All my children know this.  It’s not because they are my blood. I don’t feel this way to the rest of my family, it’s because I made them.  I chose to bring them into this world.  I remember thier first breath. 

My spouse is conditional. I chose to love you and can choose not to love you.  You can make choices that make me rethink your place in my life.  

Post # 11
Member
6510 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: February 1997

My spouse is absolutely conditional. If he decided to hit me or speak in an abusive manner toward me, my feelings would undoubtedly change toward him. My children I do love unconditionally. And yes, I am somewhat hesitant to admit that I would still love them even if they killed someone, even if they became abusive toward me, even if they did any manner of horrible acts. That doesn’t mean that I would allow them to behave that way toward me, or that I would allow them in my home if they acted that way, but I cannot imagine not loving them and wanting to get them help. I will do anything in my power to help them.

As for my Darling Husband coming second or third, well if that means that there is a burning building and I can only save one person and it is between Darling Husband and one of my children, I’d save the child. And he had damn well better do the same thing, because if he saved me he would WISH he had saved the child. Children are as close to immortality as we get. Both the genes and the love and experience we share with them will go on into the future when we are gone.

Post # 12
Member
922 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2015

turnanewleaf:  I agree.  Like karma, it just doesn’t exist. 

Post # 13
Member
5224 posts
Bee Keeper

 

Brielle:  This exactly. I don’t think human beings are capable of true unconditional love. It’s an infinite thing we can’t really comprehend with our finite minds.

Post # 14
Member
577 posts
Busy bee

I see unconditional love like I do soulmates. I find using the terms to be unnecessary. If I love someone, I love them, without ranking or labels. If I’m with someone, I’m with them because I choose to be, not because destiny cornered me too. 

Plus there are so many instances and possible circumstances that would run counter to the belief and challenge the concept, why complicate things? I do my best to live and respect those in my lives, and that’s enough in my book. 

Post # 15
Member
3586 posts
Sugar bee

I love my child and my family unconditionally.  Now as for my Fiance i can’t say that because i know what it’s like to really love a child. I’d never chose my fi over my kid. That is just me and i can only speak for myself. I hate when i see parents do this. It kills me inside to see how some parents are towards their children.  I guess it is possible to love anybody unconditionally it just really depends on the person. Btw i do love my Fiance to death i am just thinking  worse case scenario here where some people actually do pick their SO over their children.

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