- 3 years ago
- Wedding: The Retreat at Bradley\'s Pond
You’re forgetting that their network of friends 20-30 years ago was a FRACTION of the people you consider friends now. I don’t say that rudely I say in that there was no social media to discuss your pregnancy with.. so your mom told her immediate family, coworkers, friends in town and a handful of friends from college if she still had their phone number or found it in the phone book- all antiquated ideas now. Maybe 50 people knew?!
Now you’re battling with hundreds or thousands of friends from high school and college and friends along the way knowing the inner details of your physical health.
You were right to explain the concerns of miscarriages and employment and while miscarriage can happen at any point (or a still birth) it’s easier and less dramatic for all when you wait for that timeline.
I saw my “cousin” post an announcement for her pregnancy the other day and was floored that she was practically 6 weeks in and sharing with Facebook. TONS of friends congratulated her on the pregnacy which is fair and deserved. Which was nice until about 2 weeks later (if that) she wrote on the same thread that they had lost the baby. It’s terrible and from what friends have said I wouldn’t wish it on 2 happy people… but now she has to have that discussion again and again with hundreds of people instead of just letting it be.
You’re not bad parents or tacky for waiting until “the safe zone”. Heck, I had a friend ask me to do maternity photos shortly after getting pregnant because she was so high risk and even if she lost the baby she still wanted to share with her parents it was possible.
I would tell my family early on…but I would hope that they would wait until I lift the “media gag order”…it should be your news to share WHEN you want to share it.