(Closed) is your choice of bridesmaids somewhat sentimental?

posted 4 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 3
388 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: December 2013

I can only speak for myself, but I only choose people I knew I would still be talking to in 10 years.  I don’t want to look back on my wedding photos and think, who’s that?  Besides, BP really adds to the cost of the wedding… gifts, rehersal dinner, parties, etc.  My only advice is not to overdo it.  You don’t have to ask her because of an “agreement” 5 years ago.

Also, if it helps, my very best friend (like a sister to me & the god mother of one of my kids), was married a few years ago.  I was not asked to be in her bridal party (her 2 sisters were).  Was I mad, sad, irritated, etc… NO.  It’s her wedding.  I would have graciously said yes, had she asked.  But, I was not hurt or offended that she did not.  We are still great friends and she is in my wedding now.

Make your choices for you, no one else.

Post # 4
8176 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2013

i chose people who i absolutely wanted to be my BM’s.  i would not chose anyone because you feel an obligation to them.  Promises you made a children don’t have to be kept epecially if you are not longer close like you were before.

since you are questioning asking her, it doesn’t sound like you really want her as BM and I would suggest you don’t ask.


Post # 5
3736 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

Keep her on your “reserve list” if you need an extra BM. Otherwise, like PP’s said, pick people who are more likely to be a part of your life. I hear life gets crazier once you are married so if you two can’t keep up now, you may not keep up any better in the future.

Good luck and enjoy the ride!

Post # 6
261 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

I’ve been a maid of honor twice. I haven’t talked to either girl in years. They were very close friends from hs and college but both lost touch–to some extent before they even got married. I made a lot of effort and eventually gave up.

if you don’t think she is going to be a big part of your life in the future, I wouldn’t ask her.  I don’t want to look back on my pictures and be like, there’s lil sis, bestie, …..what was her name? 

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