(Closed) is your man silent in bed?

posted 10 years ago in Intimacy
  • poll: is your SO quiet in bed?

    no way, he's pretty vocal.

    he's somewhere in the middle.

    i know he likes what i'm doing, but it's pretty rare that he's vocal about it.

    he's as quiet as a church mouse.

  • Post # 18
    592 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: July 2012

    I think it’s about a happy medium. Too vocal would probably make me laugh, but too quiet is just kind of creepy. Lol.

    ETA: Maybe you should give him some positive reinforcement… just tell him you think it’s sexy when he does start making some noises.

    Post # 19
    3221 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: August 2011

    View original reply
    @kittybean: Haha I’m like…DO YOU ENJOY THIS…???

    Post # 20
    355 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: September 2012

    View original reply
    @helenberrycrunch: it’s better than clit…  lol

    Post # 21
    4605 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: March 2014

    FH isn’t very vocal, but he does let me know that he likes whatever I’m doing. But, I’m not very vocal either so it doesn’t bother me that much.

    Post # 24
    2892 posts
    Sugar bee

    Ok. I know it’s Too Much Information. But… I’m very vocal when I drink. But the only time he’s ever moderately vocal is when I’ve taken the lead in being drunkenly overly vocal. Sober? Sometimes you could hear a pin drop. It’s SUPER distracting. Like, do I stop? I am boring you? Hello? You’re still here right? ๐Ÿ™‚

    Post # 25
    3941 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: October 2011

    I have a church mouse!  I hate it!  I try to get him to be more vocal but he says that it doesn’t come naturally to him to make noises and just makes him feel awkward.

    So, I have to make enough noises for the both of us!

    Post # 26
    5150 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: June 2010

    My DH will talk a little bit and make some subtle noises but he isn’t too vocal. Sometimes I wish he was a little bit more but I think he would be if I told him that—I think I will haha this threads got us all thinking ๐Ÿ™‚ I also depends on what kind of sex we are having….are we being sweet and romantic or is it more sexy sex…if that makes sense! haha

    @claireos that’s pretty normal I think—my husband and I are both a little louder after a few ๐Ÿ˜›

    Post # 27
    7172 posts
    Busy Beekeeper

    Mine is way too quiet for my tastes.  He makes some moaning/enjoyment type noises – but few and far between.

    For those that have had success changing this – what exactly did you say?  

    I feel like I’ve tried EVERYTHING (telling him it’s a turn-on, etc.)  I think he doesn’t fully understand just how big a turn on it would be for me.  

    He actually says it’s a TURN OFF if I’m too vocal and talk.  I think it’s a TURN OFF that he’s not.  Anyone have any advice for how to cope and/or ideas???

    Post # 28
    3135 posts
    Sugar bee

    My Fiance is French.  And lettmetellya… It’s all true what ‘they’ say about French lovers!

    He is really vocal, but not PornStar-running commentary style, just ….very expressive

    Post # 29
    2495 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: January 1991

    DH is in between.  He’s usually more quiet, but towards the ‘finish’ he gets more vocal.  Since we just started having sex a month and a half ago, being too vocal makes him finish earlier than he would like, so when he’s quiet, he’s trying to concentrate on lasting, then gets more vocal when he knows he can.

    Maybe that’s why most guys are quiet?  I don’t know… ask yours! ๐Ÿ˜‰

    Post # 30
    405 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: October 2011

    Sounds are probably my biggest turn on, but Fiance rarely makes a peep, until he’s about to blow, lol. Maybe I’ll tell him to crank up the volume a bit. In bed, I would say my style is ‘When Harry Met Sally’, but it’s sort of awkward when I’m the only one making noise.

    Is anyone else INCREDIBLY turned on by certain songs? Closer by NIN, certain Dave Matthews songs. I would probably have sex with a piece of sheet music if it was single. 

    Post # 31
    326 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: June 2012

    @Masala: Closer by NIN! Definitely a turn on for me,  and Corrupt You by Depeche Mode (kinda dark but I dig it!) and don’t laugh but I still love Freak Me by Keith Sweat! haha


    My man is generally pretty quiet right until the end, but we’ve talked about it before and I always try to gently encourage more noises, if he does well afterward I’ll tell him “babe I loved when you moaned/said ____, you being vocal is a big turn on!”  If I’m on top he’ll smile at me like a little kid at the candy store, it’s so funny!!  Sometimes I have to look away so I don’t bust out laughing lol

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