(Closed) Isn't it rude to buy someone anti-aging products?

posted 3 years ago in The Lounge
Post # 16
Member
2627 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: April 2017 - Hogarths, Solihull

EllyAnne :  I’ll have it 😂 I’m 25 and started using the no 7 stuff a couple of years ago. I have mad lines on my forehead!

honestly though if it bugs you talk to her. They might just be products she uses and likes. That’s how I buy for my sister. She doesn’t necessarily know your skin care routine 

xx

Post # 17
Member
1010 posts
Bumble bee

Yes .

Post # 18
Member
4568 posts
Honey bee

Not rude in my book, especially given your age and update about similar products being the norm (beauty and makeup). Honestly you sound a little overly sensitive and insecure about it.  I view it akin to vanity sizing – if it just said brightening face wash or minimizing primer or just a basic description,  would you still be offended?  It’s either a good product or it isn’t.  Every beauty magazine and dermatologist had been touting the use of retinoids and similar starting in early 30s and some even mid to late 20s for preventative care.  And that stuff is expensive.   Unless she’s constantly making cracks about how you look old, I would assume no ill intent and she probably thought she was doing something nice.  She probably read good reviews about it somewhere.

Post # 20
Member
1150 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2019

lesbeeinlove :  who cares if she thinks she looks younger? At least she has confidence in her appearance.

Post # 21
Member
2657 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: December 2016

For me personally, I think it would depend on the person gifting me the products. If they were from my step mother (who is really into skin care and anti aging products herself), I wouldn’t be offended – she would honestly think it’s a good, thoughtful gift. If they were from my sister (who could care less about skin care and never buys those sorts of products), I would probably be a little offended – I’d be wondering what she saw in my skin that made her feel like she had to buy such products for me.

If you don’t like the gifts or won’t use them, then see if other people you know will. I think it’d be super rude to give them back to her, especially as she most likely thinks they’re great gifts.

Post # 22
Member
47 posts
Newbee

A friend of my DH’s told him that he should buy this great anti wrinkle cream for me as she had bought it for herself. I thought it was amusing as I was 23 at the time with no wrinkles and she was 40, but I wasn’t offended because I’m sure she meant well and only had good intentions. I’m sure your sister only wants to help you. I agree with pp about everyone saying that they look younger than their age, being ID’d is often random, not because you look 25 or younger. My older friends often get ID’d and they definitely don’t look younger than their age (35-40).

Post # 24
Member
392 posts
Helper bee

I would say that because your sister is really into skincare and anti-aging, she probably doesn’t mean it to say “hey use this. You need it.”  Anti-aging isn’t something you wait until you show signs of aging to use, you use it before those signs start appearing as to help keep your skin looking young. I can see how it can seem to you that she’s trying to tell you something because it’s not something you ever use, but she probably thinks she’s being helpful. 

If she wasn’t in to any of that stuff and still got you the anti-aging stuff, then I would definitely find it rude, but since she’s really into it and knows all about it, I would chalk it up to her thinking that maybe you’d try them and find that you like them. 

Next time you see her, I would just say something along the lines of “hey, I’ve been meaning to ask you, do you think I’m showing signs of aging or anything? I only ask because you always buy me all of this anti-aging stuff, so I wasn’t sure if maybe you were seeing something that I’m not.” 

Post # 25
Member
2146 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2017

Ive fallen into this trap before… someone always used this brand name product so I spent quite a bit to get them a kit thinking they would love it since they always used it and raved about it but instead they got all offended and defensive – to be honest I still dont get the reaction because the only reason I bought it was because they went on about it in the first place undecided

I frankly find it quite rude to shoot down a gift with a lot of though (especially something expensive where its obvious they listened to your likes) but some people have no decorum with recieving gifts (not aimed at OP)

to be honest in your case I wouldnt read to much into it, I remember years ago when body shop was really ‘in fashion’ everyone bought me body shop stuff (bath bombs, sented soap, musks etc…)and I got really paranoid that people where trying to say I need to bath more but honestly it was just because that was the ‘in thing’ and what they where into at the time your sister probably likes that stuff and thinks you will, it might be an unthoughtful oversite on your tastes but I dont think its malicous just smile and accept it as the nice gesture its suppose to be

Post # 26
Member
7905 posts
Bumble Beekeeper

In your situation, I think she is giving these products to you because she herself likes them. It’s not a commentary on your looks. 

Post # 27
Member
1365 posts
Bumble bee

I wouldn’t be offended in the slightest and I’d be super excited to receive those gifts! Good anti-aging products are expensive and I can’t usually afford them myself. It’s all about prevention and it sounds like her heart is in the right place as it’s something she’s concerned with herself.

Post # 28
Member
478 posts
Helper bee

My sister gave me anti aging cream for my 25th birthday. She is alo younger than me, and doesnt use anti aging creams herself. I could have been offended, but I chose not to be. I know I dont look old, and it was a nice cream that smelled delicious (like pears!).

By the way, I would tell your sister you cant use retinol products and ask if she would like it for herself so it doesnt go to waste – its not offensive to return a gift when you genuinely cant use it, and it would stop her buying those sorts of products for you in the future.

Post # 29
Member
677 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2017

The aging process starts at like age 26, and preventative skincare is for everyone, so I’d take no offense to the gift, personally, as long as it was given with a “Hey, I recently gave this product a try and it’s amazing! It makes your skin feel so soft and moisturized! I really think you’ll love it” and not like “I’ve heard this product does wonders for crow’s feet, and that made me think of you!” Who doesn’t love to pamper themselves a bit for free?

If it does offend you though, I would mention that you appreciate the awesome skincare and the thought that went into such a personal gift, but you’re very happy with your current skincare routine. If you have sensitive skin, you can use that to your advantage. 

Post # 30
Member
2657 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2017

EllyAnne :  she’s your sister, and you say she has a personal passion for skin care, she probably just wishes you shared her enthusiasm for it. No different than a dog lover telling thier friend or sibling that they should get a dog. I don’t think you should take offence. My sister is 5 years younger than me and we discuss skin care quite often. Side note though, rarely do like the same products.

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