It takes a lot to write this. **TRIGGER WARNING**

posted 1 week ago in Family
Post # 2
Member
2262 posts
Buzzing bee

Oh bee, I’m so incredibly sorry that happened to you. No one should be raised in a home where they are treated so horribly, you didnt deserve that. I hope you can one day realize that you are NOT the things they said you were. Are you still in counselling? Wounds like these ones dont heal quickly and I think you would benefit from long term counselling. Im happy you have a wonderful husband who values you. I hope you find a way to heal and move on without having to constantly deal with the scars left by those horrible people <3

Post # 3
Member
1616 posts
Bumble bee

I’m so sorry, bee – no one should ever have to go through those things.

But you are NOT the things they said about you. THEY are the ones who should be ashamed, not you.

You are so strong to have come out on the other end of this, and you have the rest of your life ahead of you to continue to grow and heal. You have made enormous progress, and things can only get better from here. <3 

Post # 4
Member
4993 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: December 2014

My first thought after reading this is that you are so incredibly strong for having survived this and being able to share your story. Nobody should have to face monsters the way that you have. I’m so glad that you were able to break free and that you now having a loving support system in your husband and son, and they they continue to help you heal. 

Post # 4
Member
8110 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 2010

gozerthegozerian :  

Oh, darling Bee.  I am so sorry for everything those monsters put you through.  You did nothing to deserve any of that.

I hear you still minimizing, ie it was only 4 steps but it still hurt.  Bee, your own mother threw you down a flight of stairs.  It doesn’t matter whether it was four steps or 100.

You mentioned that you have had therapy.  What made you stop?

It’s amazing you are doing as well as you are.  I’m so glad you found your wonderful husband who loves you.

It’ll never again be as bad as it was, Bee.

Post # 6
Member
232 posts
Helper bee

My heart breaks for you. They tried their hardest to ruin you, yet look at who you are and what you have now! A beautiful family and all the strength in the world. You overcame them. 

All the love to you, bee. 

Post # 7
Member
1151 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: March 2017

gozerthegozerian :  I am so very sorry that you had to endure all of that and had no sense of safety as a child. I will never understand parents who hurt their own children that way, it is mind boggling to me. You sound like a wonderful person who has come out the other side stronger but still kind and caring, which is an incredible testament to the amazingly brave person you are.

I know you mentioned that you have had therapy, but I highly encourage you to look into EMDR therapy if you have not yet. I did years of therapy thanks to my childhood, as well, and it wasn’t until EMDR that I was able to truly resolve some of the PTSD and anxiety that I was struggling with. More information here if you are interested: http://www.emdr.com/what-is-emdr/

Post # 8
Member
1767 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: Chateau Lake Louise

gozerthegozerian :  Oh, Bee. 

You were an innocent child, who should have only known love and protection from all of these people. That they did not uphold their duty is only and always a reflection on them and never on you. 

That you could go on to have a happy healthy relationship with a loving partner, and be a devoted mother is evidence you are NONE of the things they told you. They sensed your vulnerability, and your strength; they did everything they could to harm and scare that out of you, and they did not succeed.

As a person who to this day cannot sleep through the night, who wakens at the slightest provocation, gripped with terror that I am about to be dragged out of bed by my hair, I understand how it can still feel like their hands are on you, to hear the cruel things echoing in your head. 

The best thing I have ever done for myself, the thing that has brought me the most peace, has been EMDR therapy. It had a stunning effect on me. After only a session or two, the emotional core of memories that used to sear my heart suddenly felt unimportant. I could still remember the events, but they no longer had the same intensity or capacity to leave me overwhelmed and hurt.

If it’s at all possible, I highly recommend finding a therapist who has experience with EMDR and going in with an open mind. I cannot stress enough how much better my life has been since undergoing the process myself.

(((hugs)))

You are a courageous survivor. I commend you for speaking your truth, unashamed of the terrible things that happened to you. I admire you, truly.

Post # 11
Member
1151 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: March 2017

teamroro :  I’m so glad that it helped you, too. It really is an amazing therapy practice.

Post # 12
Member
964 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2019

sorry Bee that really sucks. I suggesting finding a new therapist. I also have PTSD for similar things happening to me. I did go through one previous counselor and a psychologist before I landed on my current counselor who is really really helpful. Sometimes you have to check out a couple before you find the ‘one’. Keep hanging on Bee! Glad your hubby and son bring you joy. 

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