Post # 1
When I was 20 I won a loose diamond from a movie contest… it’s a fancy cut emerald diamond called tycoon. It was never my favorite cut but at that time the apprasial floored me as it probably cost more than all of my worldly possesions combined. I decided I would never be comfortable with wearing that much $$, I tried to sell it – the 30% I could consign it for was disheartening… so I socked it away as my engagement ring stone because I’d probably murder a man that spent that kind of money on a diamond so this is as close as I would get (or want) to a really really nice ring
If you’ve never seen:
8 years later I met the man of my dreams and we’re talking marriage – yay! I just had to find the stone…. it was lost for the whole 9 months I looked. In the mean time I had the GIA report and the custom ring was designed (settings are next to impossible to find locally without claws for this bad boy) A few weeks ago I got the talk from my boyfriend about needing to find it asap (so it can be made in time for his secret proposal date – eek!) Ok… so in a panic I tore the house apart – TWICE – and then in tears at the mess I’ve made without any success I gave up.
The hunt for a new ring started … I figured out what I love in diamonds (and how much it’s not a fancy emerald called tycoon….) and I also figured out I loved the statement a non-diamond made (aka the green, cruelty free, less commersial greed moissy)… I found a setting I loved and I was ready for the credit card to get slapped down.
This morning I saw the box the loosey was stored in peaking out at me as I got dressed – and suddenly the tycoon had been found. At first there was excitement… and as today rolls on I’m getting sad… I’ll have a diamond ering afterall … along with and all it represents that I don’t believe in.
So now what?
My custom ring to set this loose diamond which I think is nice in will cost the same if not MORE than the whole wedding set I found and love that’s moissy. I would also be required to customize a wedding band which will make my price tag higher for sure. Additionally, bf wants diamond if I get diamond… so that means I’d be buying diamonds (against my ethics further! gaaah!)
If I sell my loosey at 30% value although it’s disheartening – I’d have enough money to buy all 3 rings (my e-ring and wedding band and his band that was to be a flashy moissy also) with some left over… and we’d be ahead the money we planned to commit to the rings. One of the sad parts about this plan is I would feel like I’m buying my own ring for myself – emotional but not logical I know. Also we had planned to put peridot/emerald secret strongs in our bands since we had to customize anyway (these are our birthstones) which is one note of sadness as I picked a prefab I liked earlier this week.
I was also thinking of redesigning my ring to use the tycoon and moissy on the side stones and the wedding band which will represent my values. I know there are diamond and moissy sets but this would be reversed to how most people do it – so is that stupid? and will the moissy sides wash out the real thing with all thier extra fire?? I don’t know if that will curb bf’s demands for diamond if I get diamond… I’d hope so.
I mostly wish I hadn’t found this today (or before I got engaged officially)… in the last few days it felt like the only part of this whole process that will be “me” until the honeymoon because I just know i’ll soon find myself having a grand wedding I never wanted 4500 miles from where my family and friends live meaning most of the people I care about will not come… but that’s for another day after the ring is settled upon!!!
Anyway… what would you do?
Post # 3
Sell it. You made it clear its not your taste. And who cares if you only get 30% for it? You didn’t buy it. GL!
ETA: I think that stone is gorgeous and needs to be worn by someone who will appreciate it.
Post # 4
Maybe try to sell it on WB?
Post # 5
I say sell it as well, but definitely shop around so you get the most money. OH, and haggle. Say-such and such is willing to give me this…can you beat it?
Post # 6
Definitely sell it! You do not seem to want it, and keeping it won’t make you happy. Selling it you get rid of something that represents an ideology you don’t like AND get to buy the rings you want and will be happy with for the rest of your life.
Seems obvious to this outsider 🙂
Post # 7
- Wedding: August 2013 - Brookfield Zoo
Sell it, there must be some way you can get better than just 30%!? And I understand you feeling like you’re buying your own rings… so I voted use it towards something else like the honeymoon 🙂
Post # 8
I would go with the custom ring, using the diamond, and try your best to talk your fiance out of a flashy diamond wedding band.
I personally just couldn’t bear to sell a diamond for 30% of what it’s worth.
Post # 9
I would not sell that diamond. Agree with @daybyday, it would just seem so wrong to sell a diamond for only 30% of what it’s worth.
Post # 10
What’s your main dilemma? Here’s a couple of suggestions depending on what is really bothering you the most:
If you hate the cut, have it re-cut.
If you’d prefer a non-diamond, sell it.
If you feel bad about the ethics of a diamond, make a donation to a children’s charity in Africa.
Post # 11
I voted to keep the diamond to set in a necklace or something and buy your own beloved custom made moisy ring. Maybe much less practical than just selling the diamond to pay for all your rings, but at least you can think about it more and still have the option to sell later on. It’s really hard to swallow that you can only get 30% of the diamond value, even if you didn’t pay for it to begin with. I hope you can haggle though and get a better sale out of it!!! Try putting it on idonowidont.com or something to see if you get any takers? I’m not saying I know much about that site or any of the other resale sites but if you do your research to find a good one you might find a better private sale for this diamond. Good luck!
Post # 12
I think you’ve found out the hard way that diamonds don’t hold their “worth”. You will be hard pressed to get more than 30% of what it is worth, because while they are SOLD for a ton of money, they are not WORTH that much. But, at least you got it for free!
I say go with the moissy, sell the diamond, and go on a nice honeymoon or get more stuff for your wedding!
Post # 13
The diamond is ONLY worth what you can get for it. Maybe you should tell you SO all of your concerns give him the diamond and let him figure it all out. In an ideal world he would buy you the ring you want and not even consider the diamond YOU won. You’re not responsible for providing for your own ring anyway.
Post # 14
@Pele: I would use the diamond. You have a beautiful diamond that was free! I dont see how leaving a perfectly good diamond sitting in a box or selling it to someone else will make ANY difference in the world.
Post # 15
Sell the diamond yourself on classifieds like diamondbistro.com, or on eBay. Don’t consign it unless you absolutely have to.
Post # 16
I’d say sell it or even keep it and make it into some other piece of jewelry later. I wouldn’t want the stone in my e-ring to be named ‘the tycoon,’ either, haha. You could always wear it as a pendant and maybe pass it on to your children one day.