Post # 1
I haven’t wrote on here too much, but I have been around for over a year. I just don’t know what to do 🙁 We were planning on having our ceremony at our church, and now they are moving to a new location and it is around the time of the wedding so they can’t gurantee us anything. So now are only have 96 days, and we have to find another church in town to let us use their space. The problem is that our church was only charging a pastor fee of $100, so that is in my budget. All the churches around here want $500-$1000 for the space… and I can’t find that amount of money in our budget. Our whole wedding is only about $3500-4000, for 100 people.
I don’t really know what I am asking for here, just needing to let it out. I am in tears about this. We don’t have a place to have our wedding and its 96 days away….:( I have tried every option I can think of… a lot of place won’t let us use their space because we aren’t members of their church, which I understand. We are just in a pickle, and I can’t find a way out of it.
We were going to change the date to August so we know we could use our new church buliding, they would be in in 100%, but all of our vendors are booked, so we wouldnt be able to get married until around December, and we would lose deposits and have to repay them.
Advice Bees?!? We live in Normal, IL
Post # 3
why don’t you have a JOP ceremony in a park or something??? And I know this doesn’t sound like your ideal plan, but you could have a courthouse wedding and then go ahead with your reception as planned!
Post # 4
can you have the ceremony in the same hall as the reception?
Post # 5
Oh, no! I wish your church had given you more notice.
Would it be possible to have your pastor officiate at an outdoor ceremony? Is there an Elks Lodge or VFW Hall that you might be able to use?
Post # 6
We have looked into all of these options as well. With all but 10 of our guests travelling we were trying to stay with our date. In our town, you still have to pay for a park, and just my luck, their are weddings in the 5 parks that allow weddings on our date. Must be an amazing date!!! LOL.
We also looked into a JOP, which if we are members of our church, our church doesn’t allow it :(. We are doing our pre-marital counseling and everything. If I could find a place for around $200, I think I could save that much up before June 18th, but $500… we just don’t have that much left over each month to save. 🙁
Post # 7
We are having our reception at the university my fiance will be graduating from. There is 1 room that we could then have the ceremony in, but we would have to only have 50 of our 100 at the ceremony, and then have all at the reception down the hall. So that is our LAST option, because we already cut the list to our 100 people we 100% wanted there with us on our big day!!
Post # 8
Awww…that really sucks! I’m sorry you are having to deal with this so close to the big day! I am not really sure if I have that great of advice here, but have you thought about doing it at another venue aside from a church. I mean, clearly you have had your heart set on getting married in a church, but maybe consider an outdoor venue like a park or backyard space. Usually those are really cheap, if not free. My budget is about the same as yours, so I definitely understand the struggle you are facing to make the numbers crunch. Another possibility would be to cut somewhere else in the budget in order to accommodate the cost of another more expensive church. Have you considered DIYing your own flowers? If you aren’t already, I know that can cut a budget a lot. I am making all of my own. It won’t be as great as if a florist did it, but it’s worth it to be able to spend that money elsewhere.
Best of luck to you!!! I’m sure you’ll figure it out 🙂
Post # 9
what’s happening with the church after your church moves? Will it change ownership? Will it be demolished? I would find out and talk to the powers that be to see if you can still have it there, even if your church moves. You’d be surprised how far “but I’ve always dreamed of having my wedding here” goes! Even if it’s a new owner, certainly they could spare 1-2 hours to let you have your dream, no?
Keep your eyes on the prize and move through the obstacles. Don’t give up!
Post # 10
There are no parks available our day, or our pastor would do this for us, yes. And no, we don’t have any of those halls or lodges. It’s a college town around here mostly.
Post # 11
Well, I don’t know much about how churches work, but isn’t the whole thing about religion being kind and caring to others (amoungst other things that is)?
Can’t you just go in and talk to the pastor of another church and explain the situation? If they truly believe in religion, couldn’t they find it in their heart to let you do it there for the budget you have? Maybe they will let you pay it off after the wedding too?
Post # 12
What about a backyard? As long as it is just the ceremony it shouldn’t cost too much to rent chairs, and although it might not look the nicest the local VFW hall or somewhere might be able to let you borrow the chairs. Even though your church isn’t available your Pastor should still be available and he could do it in the backyard, that way you wouldn’t need the JOP that your church doesn’t allow.
Post # 13
Thanks for the encouragement. Our church is actually renting the space (for 7 years now) at an old theatre building. A club bought this space and became the new landlords, they actually just pay rent to them now, and only use the space on Sundays and 1 week a month for a meetings. We talked to the new owners and he was going to charge us $600 to use the space, but it would have been FREE if they didn’t own it.
I used that line, thats how I got it down toe $600 from $1500.
Post # 14
@bunnyfoofoo: totally agree with you! If the church isn’t being demolished, then I dont see why you couldn’t still have the ceremony there?? Everyone has a sister/wife/daughter/friend and knows how special a wedding is. If it were me, I would be nice but reiterate how important this day/place/time is to you, not to mention invites are out, everything else is booked and you are soooo excited. Might work wonders 😉 GOOD LUCK!!!
Post # 15
To get our budget that low, we actually aren’t having flowers, well my Fiance and I will have our flowers, the guys have pocket sqaures, and the woman will carry clutches down. I am DIYing my and FIs flowers. Our pastor will do anything, he wouldn’t mind an outside wedding at all. With it being a summer June wedding, either everything is BOOKED or $$$$$$$$
Post # 15
Would your pastor be willing to talk to the pastor of another church in your area, and try to work out an arrangement? My experience with church leaders is they are 1) very accommodating to eachother as a professional courtesy and 2) supportive of marriage in church. If not, and if your church takes possession of their new building before your wedding, discuss your financial situation with your pastor during one of your pre-marital counseling sessions and let him know you would be willing to have your ceremony performed in the new location even if it means the paint isn’t yet dry.