(Closed) It's coming up on 8 years, still no progress…

posted 7 years ago in Waiting
Post # 16
Member
409 posts
Helper bee

 

dawnmelan:  Have you guys ever talked about marriage before? A lot of couples any more move in together, buy homes together without having that talk. Sadly, a lot of people are against marriage (not really sure why). However, I do not think that is your case. Maybe he feels like you two are in such a great spot that it isn’t needed right now. Def talk with him.

Post # 18
Member
2011 posts
Buzzing bee

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dawnmelan:  If you guys are mature enough to purchase a house together (i really hope you’re both on the mortgage) then you should be able to have an adult conversation about marriage. 

Post # 19
Member
1178 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

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dawnmelan:  
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dawnmelan:  you have given him a married life without having to marry you.

 

When discussion of buying a house came up, you should have said that is something people do when they have committed to spending their lives together and affirmed that commitment through marriage.

 

 

Post # 20
Member
1247 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: January 2015

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dawnmelan:  he’s never thought about it? I would find that insulting. 

Post # 21
Member
31 posts
Newbee

I know exactly how you feel! I’ve been with my partner just over 10 years, bought our house 3 years ago and are very happy and very much in love. Just no proposal. Not even a ring hiding in a cupboard somewhere (as far as I know haha!) I cant really give you any advice other than talk to him (which is all well and good me saying that, but I dont want to talk to mine for fear of making him feel pressured)

I hope it all works out for you 🙂

Post # 22
Member
266 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2017

Blindly saying “it’ll happen when it happens” means it’s probably not going to happen. He said he never thought about it, just like you, he might be thinking “Why rock the boat? I’m happy as things are.” and easily go back to not thinking about it. And if marriage is something you want, you’ll become resentful. I think this warrants another talk. 

Marriage is no fairytale, it’s two people deciding they want to spend the rest of their lives together. It’s a huge decision. Do you want someone making that decision for you? Just something to think about. 

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