- 3 years ago
- Wedding: September 2018
Full disclosure here:
I have purchased 4 wedding dresses at this point.
And they are all lovely, beautiful dresses, except one that I bought with my best friend on a whim because she flew in to see me and I got caught up in the moment. This dress was a just not at all right. I shamefully never even picked it up in the shop.
Every time I am certain it’s “the one” and then when I have the dress, though people say they look lovely on me, I fall out of love and think: meh.
At first I thought it was just poor decision making or wrong dress. But today the truly beautiful dress which ticked all the boxes arrived and I realized: I just don’t think I look like a bride. As in: I think I look just “off” as a bride. I don’t know how to describe it, but at this point it’s not about the dress. I love the dress. I just don’t love me in it.
Apparently, I don’t like wedding dresses on myself. Maybe because I am 45 and never been married. Maybe I have been having too many expectations about this dress and the day and nothing is living up to it. Maybe I have hidden self esteem issues. Maybe I am just some sort of freaky person who loves shopping for the dress but not actually wearing the dress. Maybe I just don’t want to find “the dress” and it be all over.
Maybe it’s all of these things. Or none.
If anyone has any ideas what the heck is going on or has experienced similar please chime in. Because I am at a loss (and so is my budget)