(Closed) It's over. I was blindsided.

posted 8 years ago in Emotional
Post # 32
Member
789 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: February 2014

 Is it wrong that in some ways I feel like a weight has been lifted off of me?


No, we cant hurt and feel a sense of relief at the same time, Ive been there. As much as it hurts you know deep down you are better off so you are ahead of the game. You know you will move past this and you have your friends & family. Each day that goes by the stomach knots will say goodbye as well. sorry you had to go through this..Good luck lady. 🙂



Post # 33
Member
698 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

I’m sick to my stomach reading this. What a complete jerk. I’m so so sorry this happened to you. I’m glad you have friends and family to lean on.

HUGS!

Post # 35
Member
1659 posts
Bumble bee

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@SnowInApril: Like I said, you totallydodged a bullet!!

Post # 36
Member
267 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

((((((((((((((HUG)))))))))))))
That’s all i got. 🙁 

Post # 37
Member
7638 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

Oh that’s terrible (and so typical!). *Hugs* again.

Can I just say one thing though? If you see him again, don’t slap him again. You don’t want any argument to become physical.

Post # 38
Member
245 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

Oh man :/ I was really rooting for you (I followed your earlier posts) and I’m so sorry it ended like this. I’m glad you didn’t put up with his bullshit excuses. He sounds like a huge shithead. At least you didn’t find out after the wedding. 

Take care of yourself and surround yourself with family and friends. Get out with friends frequently and know that healing is ‘two steps forward and one step back’. Take care of yourself (hot baths or something relaxing) and eat yummy food. 

 

Post # 39
Member
232 posts
Helper bee

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@SnowInApril:  If she did know about you, that’s very gross on her part. 🙁 I’m sorry. I have a feeling she’ll stop being exciting to him soon enough, and then he will realize that he’s a complete idiot and lost something awesome because he went after a new temporary excitement.

Post # 40
Member
538 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

View original reply
@PlumeriaSplash:  +1!

Here’s to a life without that selfish, deceptive, and inconsiderate loser in it.

**BIG HUGS**

Post # 41
Member
1152 posts
Bumble bee

I’ve been waiting to see how things would turn out. I was hoping it would be better than this.

I try not to use profanity so I will not use any of the descriptive words in my head. I will just say – I am pissed.

I wish you could stay in touch because I feel like I’ve gotten very emotionally invested in your story. I want to hear from you when things are good, I want to know when you are happy again. But I understand if it would be just too painful to hang around this site at all.

Just know that all my love is going out to you and you will be in my thoughts. You can do it, you have proven to be an extremely strong woman. I wish nothing but the best for you.

Post # 42
Member
214 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

you 100% deserve better! stay strong

Post # 43
Member
401 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

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@SnowInApril:  please do not blame yourself. There are plenty of people in truly unhappy relationships who stay faithful and plenty in happy relationships that cheat. You cannot control another persons behavior. We will see how good he is to this new girl when the infatuation fades and she isn’t “exciting” anymore…

Anyway, I am so sorry this happened. You will come through this stronger -hugs-

Post # 44
Member
245 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

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@SnowInApril:  Don’t blame yourself for anything! That d-bag does not deserve you! I am so very sorry he did this to you. What a massive, gaping arsehole. 

Post # 45
Member
1344 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: January 2014

You did NOT drive him to this.

If you had done everything perfectly, he probably still would have cheated and if he didn’t, it wouldn’t be ‘real’, you’d always have to do everything 110% to keep him from cheating. You want to know that your husband/fiance/boyfriend will be faithful no matter how tough it gets. If it’s not fulfilling, you leave, you don’t cheat.

This girl won’t be exciting forever. When you’re in a relationship, you become habituated after a while, the ‘rush’ that was always present in the beginning isn’t always there after a while, plus there’s less mystery. He’s setting himself up for a miserable life by running off after someone ‘exciting’, because that feeling fades after a while. What he’s done to hurt you will cause him a lot of pain in the future.

I’m sorry you’re hurting, but thank goodness you didn’t marry this asshole!

Post # 46
Member
2587 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2014 - UK

I am so so sorry this has happened to you – but I can promise you that it’s NOT your fault, it’s his. 3 months isn’t a one-off accident, it’s a consistent and calculated thing. He’s had time to think about it and more than enough time to break it off.

I know it doesn’t feel like it now, but in some ways you lucked out here. You deserve better than him.

With the ring – can you get the diamond back? It was an heirloom, by rights it’s yours anyway.

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