(Closed) It's OVER. Lying, cheating scumbag husband

posted 7 years ago in Emotional
Post # 77
Member
347 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

@Pomapoo:  Aww so sorry to hear hun 🙁 Just curious, how did you find out? Did he simply just confess?

Post # 78
Member
366 posts
Helper bee

I’m so sorry that this happened to you. What is WRONG with some people?!?

I have to reiterate the advise of PP’s – get a lawyer ASAP.

And if you are still living in the marital home and he is not, put a deadbolt on the door that you can lock when you are home and when you are away. I had a friend go through a messy divorce and the husband came back to the marital home when he knew she wasn’t there and cleaned it out. I don’t know about the US, but in Canada, neither party is allowed to remove ANYTHING from the marital home while the separation/divorce is going on. It’s all assets which have to be divided (think things like appliances, electronics, jewellery, furniture …). If it gets removed from the marital home, you can’t get it back.

Post # 79
Member
113 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: November 2013

Get yourself a good attorney, focus on healing and do the best you can to move on.

Post # 81
Member
555 posts
Busy bee

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@Pomapoo:  Just want to say that I saw pics of you and you are ridiculously gorgeous–that being said, he doesn’t deserve you at ALL. You WILL find a man who will treat you like a princess. Can’t believe this.

Post # 82
Member
6518 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: September 2013

@Pomapoo:  i am really sorry that you have to go through this. that is terrible

karma is a bitch

Post # 84
Member
1636 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

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@Pomapoo:  One day this will be a distant memory. RIght now, take care of yourself. I actually pity the other woman. How she got him is how she will loose him. You will find yourself the man of your dream!  Think positive.

It’s not your fault!

Post # 85
Member
3 posts
Wannabee

@Pomapoo:  so I know that I’m late to this thread, and I’m not sure if anyone else has said anything, but I am so sorry and I am heartbroken for you.  As soon as you are able to make some decisions, pick yourself up, dust yourself off, and serve him with divorce papers immediately for adultery, making sure that you have evidence of his cheating (sounds like you have his confession).  My good friend was in this same situation about 9 months ago, and she just walked away with a 65% divorce settlement and her scumbag husband who was cheating on her with a porn star that he met over some 1-900 line (no joke) is going to have to liquidate his business and sell everything he owns to pay.  Sucks to be him, he was crying in court and asking the judge for mercy.  What a loser.  My friend just smiled and walked away – and looking back, she is so happy because she finally realizes she is better off without him and can now devote herself to the people who really do love her.  You are precious and your value doesn’t come from some low-life like him.  Prayers for you!

Post # 86
Member
3 posts
Wannabee

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@DVR:  I forgot to mention that in most (if not all) 50 states, the court sides with the wronged spouse in the case of adultery, and the assets are split at least 60-40, sometimes much more.

Post # 87
Member
1935 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: February 2014

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@Pomapoo:  Seeing threads like this make my blood boil. I can’t stand people who lie and cheat, above all else, and your husband sounds like he’s perfected the practice to a T. 

I’m going to echo some other Bees and tell you to get a lawyer, immediately. Document everything so you remember it later on. My guess is that once you bring up his co-worker, the lawyers will definitely want to delve into his work habits and inquire for expenses, phone records, etc. Once his company catches wind of this… well, he will probably have a LOT more legal issues to worry about. 

But first, take care of you. File papers and be sure to do it first. You deserve better in life than someone who belittles you and makes you feel anything less than amazing. He’s a fucking scumbag. 

Post # 88
Member
941 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

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@Pomapoo:  thinking and praying you bee. And I’m so freaking sorry that he turned out to be such a terrible person.  But I’m so happy you can move on with your life.  Once this passes, the whole world will become yours with no one holding you back or putting you down. 

Post # 90
Member
9967 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2012

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@Pomapoo:  ((HUGS)) I’m glad you’re in counseling.  I wish you all the best, hon.

Post # 91
Member
3422 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

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@Pomapoo:  Good for you!! Sounds like you are taking the necessary steps to take care of yourself Huge HUGs to you!! You can do it! We’ll be here cheering you on:)

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