Post # 1
Ahh, yes. I’ve read so many times before on here about people inviting themselves to a wedding. And now it’s happened to me.
Right of passage?
A very old friend, from 10-15 years ago, contacted me via Facebook. We are friends on there but never really communicate. She congratulated me on the engagement and then asked if we had a date. I told her our tentative date. Obviously from this post, she proceeded to say how she’d love to have a reunion with all of her old friends so she’ll fly up here (from Texas) around then so she can attend my wedding and see everyone again. Seriously!?
I’m not one to really beat around the bush, but I also try not to be a total a-hole. I told her the whole spiel about possibly not having enough room so I’d have to let her know. It’s the truth, since we are having a small-ish wedding, so it’s not like I lied. The only thing is, I juuust couldn’t leave it at that.
This woman has been married twice but I was never even considered for an invite. I couldn’t resist asking her why she wouldn’t expect the same. She gave me some BS about she didn’t think to invite us since travel is so expensive, etc. etc. Reality is, we’re not that great of friends anymore. Facebook acquaintances, sure. But best buds? No. She came up to visit with other friends about 3 years ago and didn’t even bother to tell me. I found that out through a mutual friend. What makes her think that it’s okay to invite herself to my wedding and that she’d be invited anyway?
Thanks for letting me vent a little bit. Don’t worry, I’ll be keeping all future plans from her.
Post # 3
People are rude. She’s fishing for an invitation, but only you can invite her. So, don’t, if you don’t want her there. But keeping all wedding plans from her is a smart decision!
Post # 4
Sometimes…. I just wonder what people are thinking when they do things like this…..
Post # 5
Wow, how presumptuous of her! If she wants to have a reunion with her friends, she can arrange one. Sheesh.
Post # 6
I hate that! I’m so sorry you had to deal with that.
Must totally have a right of passage- I have a “cousin” (she is my dad’s brother’s ex-wife’s daughter with her new husband) I met her once… She posted on my fb, months after I got engaged, on a post about the sandy hurricane (my fam is in nyc), “congratulations on your engagement, i am expecting an invite, thank you” WTF! I ignored it, laughed, and then ignored it…
I seriously want to delete my fb when shit like that happens.
Post # 7
I’ve had this happen too. I’m having a small budget wedding and I really can’t afford to have people I haven’t talked to in years there. I would never take it upong myself to be like “so am I invited to the wedding?” It’s rude and puts you in a really weird spot of either saying yes or having to say no.
My little story of someone assuming they are invited-
~I had a girl I worked with who I hung out with a couple times outside of work, but she quit a couple months ago and I haven’t talked to her since. When we hung out a couple times she’d bring up my wedding and wanting to go and I’d always tell her that we’re keeping the guest list small to save on money and that we really want to do only close family and friends. I figured that was an understanding that I wouldn’t be inviting her…well she stopped into work the other day to say hi to everyone and comes up to me and says “Hey just wanted to let you know I got a dress for your wedding and I’m either going to bring Jake, Kyle, or Mark” (I don’t remember the exact guys names) She then went on to say it’s between these guys because she’s trying to figure out who she’d have more fun drinking and dancing with. I was in shock my jaw just dropped.
Post # 8
@ljpink: That is one clueless girl you worked with. Wowww.
@maplemag: I just can’t imagine seriously telling someone “I’m expecting an invite!”
What is WRONG with people!?
Post # 9
Tell her your guest list is full. End of story. That is just ridiculous
Post # 10
@LiliKitty: I know! I would never say that to someone!
Post # 11
I have found this a lot with younger people, women especially (guys don’t seem to care as much, I guess!). I had a not-so-close friend ask me if she was invited. Luckily, she immediately followed it up with, “It’s ok if I’m not, I know weddings are expensive.” And why is it’s always the people who aren’t invited are the ones to ask…?
Post # 12
i wish this would happen to me – i think it’s fun coming up with funny ways to tell rude people off!
Post # 13
Our gave us this doozy a few weeks ago… “I hope you arent doing it March 23rd because we already have a wedding to go to that weekend and we dont want to miss yours!” LOL. I was like… what?? We have only lived here a few months and hardly know you lady!
Post # 14
Good for you for the way you handled it! I’ve had a couple people come up to me and flat out ask if they can come to the wedding. It’s such an uncomfortable situation and I don’t think fast enough on my feet.
Post # 15
lol this happened to me on FB of course (where else) I announced my wedding date and an old friend who i have not seen in years and who didn’t invite me to her wedding said ” I better get an invite” she also happens to be the same person who asked me to be a bridesmaid then unasked me…..yah no your not getting an invite, i didn’t even respond but she will figure that out when my wedding passes and she doesn’t receive an invite.
Post # 16
This kinda reminds me of someone (the only person) I feel obligated to invite. A day or so after we set a date/location I was catching up with a law school “friend.” We’re cool and all, have been shopping together and have done lunch from time to time, but we’re not besties by any stretch (also I think she think more highly of me than I think of her) said “well just make sure you invite me, ok?!” and I was so giddy and happy and not thinking straight. I just said “uh huh. sure” and kept talking about whatever I was talking about. We have only had one conversation since then– and it wasn’t really pleasant. She said some things about my FH that I took as disrespectful. It’s been 2 months or more. In that same conversation she told me about her new “boo” and remarked that she’ll be bringing him to the wedding and treat it as a romatic vacay for them. M’eh. I really wouldn’t mind if she didn’t come (especially given that I don’t intend to invite this guy I’ve never met to my 40-person wedding).