Post # 1
Mr.D and I just got back from a week long cruise to the Bahamas. Stopping at Grand Turk, Half Moon Cay and Freeport, but the magically Island of Half Moon Cay is where Mr. D went down on one knee and as me to marry him. We were cruising with a large group of people and after being there for a couple hours I laid on a lounge chair to sun myself and then he appared while I was half asleep, on one knee, ring in his hand, shaking ( it was 96 degrees outside.) He was so nervous he was studdering. I said yes and the group was cheering from the water.
Well I wasn’t able to get in touch with my family and had to wait till I got home on sunday. Well Mr. Duckerson’s mom, we’ll call her Lisa, had used her cellphone and called home to tell her sister that I said yes. It really bugged me that I couldn’t do it. Well when I finally got home I found out Lisa had clued in Mr. Duckerson’s whole entire family before we had left for our trip. Then when I went to lunch with his mom, grandparents, and aunt, they had already seen the ring before we had left too. So there I was all giddy and come to find out that everyone heard he was going to ask and Lisa had shown them the ring.
I’m over the moon that Mr. Duckerson wants to spend the rest of his life with me like I want to do with him, but coming home to having everyone know about the engagement before I could even say Hi, just hurts my feelings. Am I over reacting about being uspet?
Post # 3
Meh… My DH showed literally everyone the ring before he proposed (all of our friends and family). When I told people about the engagement everyone was like “oh yeah I know he told me!” He’s really bad at keeping secrets, so I guess it was his way to keep himself from telling me. The only people who didn’t already know I was engaged were my coworkers.
I would just try to let it go. There is absolutely nothing you can do about it now and bringing it up will taint a happy time. They are all probably just super excited! Try not to let it get you down!
Post # 4
Yes you are.
Why do you think she told everyone and showed everyone the ring – BECAUSE SHE IS EXCITED FOR YOU! How nice to have in-laws who are bursting at the seems to tell everyone about you becoming a part of their family!
Perhaps it wasn’t how you envisioned telling everyone but it was nice all the same. They will be just as excited for you at your shower and the actual wedding. There will be time to gush over dresses and flowers and do all the other things that you are dieing to do.
Plus, can you imagine them knowing that he was going to propose and then waiting for a week without any news?! How awful! They might have thought that you had said no! Much better that they find out the good news asap.
Let it go and enjoy surprising your own family with the news.
Post # 5
When dh asked my parents for permission my mom got so excited she tried on my ring!
I would choose to focus on the positive:obviously his family loves you and is very excited for you. That’s a great thing! And congrats 🙂
Post # 6
I think it’s sweet that he was so excited that he told people about the proposal before it happened- everyone is excited for you!
You had a lovely proposal; I think you should try to let it go and just enjoy how happy everyone is on your behalf right now. 🙂
My proposal from DH was a total surprise in front of a TON of our friends and family, so literally EVERYONE knew about it before I did. My family knew, his family knew, all of our friends knew- I was literally the last person to find out. But it was so sweet that he wanted me to be able to share our proposal with my closest friends and loved ones.
Post # 7
That was kind of lame of them to do, you shouldn’t go spreading other people’s news before they give you the go ahead.
But I’m sure it was well intentioned. It’s a wonderful thing to have people who are excited for you. Have a vent then let it go.
Post # 8
You guys are right. I guess I was over reacting about the situation. I’ll just focus on the good stuff like starting to plan!!
Post # 9
I understand you. When FI and I were talking about getting engaged, I told him not to tell everyone. He could obviously tell some (I wouldn’t expect him to keep it a complete secret) but that I wanted to tell people as well
A couple friends knew and his parents and my dad knew.
We got to make an announcement to my friends, my mom, and our brothers.
Luckily, no one he told blabbed about it. I would have been annoyed about it too.
Post # 10
@DuckyPDuckerson: His parents, sister, and BIL all guessed ahead of time because the ring was shipped to their house and he did a bad job pretending it was something else. My parents knew because he called my dad the night before to ask him first, and my dad texted my mom (she was at a cottage – seriously though what a thing to do via text) and told her. So like 6 people knew ahead of time, we visited both our parents and siblings that weekend, visited my grandparents to tell them, called our friends, told our coworkers on the Monday, and then posted it on Facebook. Everyone was very happy for us, and I don’t care that some people knew ahead of time. So, in summary, I do think you are overreacting a little.
Post # 11
Everyone’s happy for you, don’t let this get to you. Just be happy and move on.
Post # 12
There are definitely worse problems to have than having a whole family of people who are so excited for you they can’t keep their mouths shut. 🙂
Post # 13
I’m assuming that you do still have your own people you can tell who don’t know and can be excited. A lot of our family knew, I think that’s pretty normal when a guy is close with his family! In fact we were on family vacation and my MIL carried my ring like the entire trip. They all were waiting for us when we got back to the hotel. Didn’t bother me at all.
Post # 14
@DuckyPDuckerson: Ya you’re overreacting but I would be the exact same way. I really don’t like when people know things about me before I do! It just rubs me the wrong way. Irrational maybe but that’s just the way I am! So ya you’re allowed to be a bit upset, but just keep it to yourself 🙂
Post # 15
My FH told my BFF exactly when he was going to ask. She was literally staring at her phone when I called.
He got to tell his family and friends. Did you get to tell yours?
I think telling my parents was the best!
Post # 16
It’s a bit of an over reaction, but I understand where you are coming from. He bought the ring with me in the room. We told our parents and a few close friends right away, with the caviet of “we don’t have the ring yet, and we are not going to anounce our engagement until the ring is in.” I wanted to start working on wedding planning because there were very few dates that worked for my family, and I knew the venue and church I wanted filled up fast.
My parents kept a secret. My cousin even asked them durring the two weeks we asked them to keep it quiet, and they were “Oh, it may be coming soon.”
His parents told EVERYONE! It really wasn’t a suprise anymore. It was okay though, in the end. Just not going to ask them to keep many big secrets in the future.