- 4 years ago
So, I’ve been with my SO for about 4 years now. He’s the only person I’ve ever slept with, though I’m not his first. We are not even engaged at this point, but we have been together a long time, are essentially living together, and we have talked about how it’s the right time in our lives for us to start thinking about getting engaged soon.
I love him with all my heart. He is absolutely the perfect man for me and nobody makes me happier, except for one little problem: our sex life. When we have sex, it’s just sort of… fine. It’s far from being something I hate or anything like that, but I can say that in our four years together (I guess 3.5 years of having sex since I didn’t sleep with him until six months in) there has honestly never been a time we had sex that has been mind blowingly good, or anything like that. In fact, I’ve never really had an orgasm via intercourse. Which sounds pretty sad and pathetic. Now it’s gotten to the point where it’s basically something I just feel I need to get over with, in order to make him happy.
He is very handsome, makes me laugh, and I can’t see myself with anyone else… But I feel like I have just been waiting for our sex life to get more exciting on its own and now I’m afraid it’s never going to.
And though I feel really guilty about it, I can’t stop myself from wondering if there is a man out there who would be my perfect match in bed and knows how to press all my orgasm buttons, and would I be missing out by eventually marrying my SO? I mean, don’t I deserve some good sex? I’m only in my mid twenties.
But on the other hand, even IF there is a sex god out there for me, there are no guarantees that he would be as great for me OUTSIDE of the bedroom as my SO currently is.
Is anybody out there going through sort of the same thing or does anyone have any advice? Maybe some tips on spicing up our sex life or things I can do to help me achieve an orgasm via intercourse? I’m so frustrated because if we had a great sex life, then our relationship would be so perfect.