Memberfab25: It would honestly never occur to me to bring a gift to a Jack and Jill. Where I’m from (also Ontario) the wedding party sells tickets and you show up for the free food and drinks and a shot at the 50/50. Everything else sounds confusing.
MemberIn general, I think fund-raising wedding events like jack and jills are really tacky so I would decline.
Why don’t you just have a co-ed shower?
Memberfab25: A jack and jill wedding shower is perfect in this case! Every bridal shower I have been to have games and prizes, but they are all more women-focused (like- what’s in your purse? for example) But since you are doing a co-ed shower, you can do lawn games, or other things that aren’t specific to a bridal shower and hand out prizes to the winners. That will keep people entertained for sure!
As long as you aren’t hosting it – this sounds like a perfect solution!
MemberA Jack and Jill shower is fine, as long as someone else is hosting. You don’t throw yourself a party and tell people you want gifts.
Memberfab25: “So maybe the best course of action would be just to have a Jack and Jill wedding shower, and we can do a few free games and have smaller prizes just to keep guests entertained.”
Perfect solution. It’s clear that even though you were adamant about not having a bridal shower, your family overruled you, so just call it what it is — a co-ed shower, where entertaining (free) games/prizes sound like a lot of fun. Especially since you already said in your follow-up post that you guys aren’t throwing this party yourselves.
Memberjulies1949: Yes, I think I like the idea of the Jack and Jill wedding shower way better. Thanks for the reply 🙂
Someone else is hosting, a few people are actually involved in the planning. Another question I would like to ask is who would you typically put on the invitation as the host? What if there are several people?
Memberfab25: You can simply issue the invitation without the hosts’ name in the first line.
“Join us for a shower in honor of _ and __ “
Pick one name for the rsvp’s.
Here are some sample invitaions
http://www.paperstyle.com/is-bin/Tips/Couples-Shower-Invitation-Wording
HostessIt really depends on your area.. Where I’m from in Ontario, stag and does/jack and jills are huge, I counted today and I have been invited to 31 Stag and Does from end of April to end of August lol. In my area, it’s super popular and what people like to do for fun in the summer months. I love the idea of supporting other young couples while getting to have great drinks, see old friends, and win awesome prizes. Every region is different with different “traditions” that are widely accepted.
MemberI agree it all depends on your area. Some people on here are really rude saying they are tacky and stuff and should watch what they say… If you have never heard of one why even comment. I am having one but in my town pretty much every single couple has one! Its pretty much just a fun huge party where you can buy cheap drinks and and support the couple who is getting married and its not “rude” or “tacky” at all.
MemberI do think most jack and Jill’s are known as a way to have the briee and groom raise money so maybe just come up with another name?
Memberfab25: Whoever is hosting should create and send the invitation… without prompting from you, otherwise they’re not really hosting as a gift to you – they’re being told to throw you a gift giving event. As far as I know, shower invites don’t necessarily usually say who is hosting, but they come from the host and the guest RSVPs to the host, so it becomes obvious.
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