January 2020 POAS – TTC After Loss Edition

posted 5 months ago in TTC
Post # 2
Member
491 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: December 2017 - City, State

Thanks for starting this thread, @zstbee84. I definitely find it useful to have a safe space to talk about our losses, and how they affect trying again.

I’ll be POAS in December around the 25th, but I’ll officially roll call here if I roll over to January. I’ll keep chatting here until then, too, if that’s okay. 🙂

Curious if anyone else is having an extra tough time during the holiday season, after loss?  I’ve been looking into remembrance ornaments with pictures of his footprints… it would feel really nice to give him some tangible “presence” in our celebrations.

Post # 3
Member
451 posts
Helper bee

ROLL CALL

Your age/partner’s age: 31/32

Baby #: 1

Current Cycle Day/DPO: 1

Ovulation Date: Not sure. 1st period since MC started today. I am guessing 1/1. based on Fertility Friend app. 

POAS Date: 1/17.

Usual Cycle Length: 28-29 Days. Wondering if that will be the case this go around.

Cycles Trying and Loss History: 3. Got pregnant on 3rd but MC at 5 weeks and a few days.

BFP Plan (BD timing, charting, prenatals, supplements, etc.): No plans. Husband wants to wait till next period to “sort my body out” but whatever happens happens. Last time I tracked with OPKs but. eh. Lol. Not so adamant this go around because I am ready to get back on track but at the same time just had a loss. 

Trying anything new this month? Nah!

Link to your chart if charting: –

Treatment Plan (if any): This was my first pregnancy and loss. I think this time once I get an at home test done, I will call in to get bloodwork done. I want them to follow my progesterone as well. Because ofcourse I don’t know what caused my early loss, but if it were progesterone, I would rather fix that than go through a loss again. Cause it hurt REALLY bad and mentally wore me out.

For fun: New Year resolutions : Start working on spending much less than I usually do. We paid off 45% of our mortgage in 12 months. I want to knock out the other 55% by this time next year! And hopefully before any babies get here but its ok if that doesn’t happen exactly that way. ;]

Post # 7
Member
491 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: December 2017 - City, State

View original reply
zstbee84 :  Thanks for such a thoughtful response. We recently moved an ocean away from our major support systems, so I’m sure that’s contributing to the extra tough times. We’re slowly building new connections, but it takes time (and courage!) to open up about struggling, sometimes. I’m so glad that you were able to find a colleague who “got it” and offered some useful support. 🙂

I’m so sorry for all that you’re going through this time of year. It is so heartbreaking that you’ve had to suffer through two losses. I can relate to how hard it is watching everyone’s lives moving forward with their little ones, while feeling stuck in place with empty arms. It’s such a complex mix of emotions: the grieving, the fear, and the hope. If nothing else, I’ve learned how non-linear the healing and growing process can be. I get that IVF is not a magic pill, but I really hope that it helps you on your journey. <3

Post # 8
Member
1881 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

I’m not sure if I belong in the infertility boards, or this board. I will post and lurk for a bit till I see how I’m feeling. It’s been a really, really rough month. It’s now been a year since we decided to start trying again and still no baby. Plus this was the cycle we got pregnant on last year, I’m not starting the new year with any hope. It’s been hard. 


ROLL CALL

Your age/partner’s age: I’m 30, hes 34

Baby #: 2

Current Cycle Day/DPO: currently CD7

Ovulation Date: not sure yet, I’d assume the 1st

POAS Date: probably the 13th?

Usual Cycle Length: 28 days 

Cycles Trying and Loss History: we tried for two cycles and conceived last January, and had a MMC on March 7th. I went in for my first routine  midwife appointment at 10w and when she couldnt find the heartbeat with the Doppler, she sent me for an ultrasound just to reassure me and we found out that even though the baby was measuring on schedule, there was no heartbeat. Not sure why it happened. But we’ve been trying since April and haven’t had another positive. 

BFP Plan (BD timing, charting, prenatals, supplements, etc.): so many things, I’m so sick of it. I’m charting, wearing the Ava bracelet, using OPKs, tried the SMEP last month, prenatals, so many supplements and herbs, fertility acupuncture. I’ve had fertility bloodwork and a checkup and everything is coming f back normal so far. We’re going to do a SA in the next few weeks to see if my husband has any issues.

Trying anything new this month? Not really, I’m cutting back on some of the supplements and not caring as much. Not in a “I don’t care but am actually obsessing” way, I honestly just have lost hope so I’m just going through the motions. 

Link to your chart if charting: 

Treatment Plan (if any): I’m continuing with the acupuncture because I like how relaxing it is, it gives me energy the next couple days after and has helped me ovulate on time. Otherwise I’m not sure what our next step is. We have no idea what’s taking so long

For fun: New Year resolutions 

not sure this year. Last year it was to get pregnant so I’m not going to do that again. I’d like to make date nights a priority and move to MN so that’s something 

Post # 9
Member
1956 posts
Buzzing bee

View original reply
zstbee84 :  Great idea to start this. Rooting for everyone here ♥

Post # 11
Member
491 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: December 2017 - City, State

View original reply
zstbee84 :  I’m so sorry to hear about the lack of progression on your tests. That must be an awful position to be in. I hope you get some clear answers soon.

Post # 12
Member
491 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: December 2017 - City, State

ROLL CALL

Your age/partner’s age:  32/31

Baby #:  1 (and 1 MC)

Current Cycle Day/DPO: 4DPO

Ovulation Date: about 1/9

POAS Date: about 1/21 (at 12DPO)

Usual Cycle Length: 26 days

Cycles Trying and Loss History: This is cycle 9 after my MC.  After a textbook first trimester with several healthy heartbeats, no bleeding, and normal genetic test results, I miscarried in the second tri, due to either cervical incompetence or immature labor. So far I’ve consulted with three doctors (at two hospitals), and none are willing to place a preventative cerclage (if I do get pregnant again).. so I’m definitely concerned about the high risk of another second trimester loss.

BFP Plan (BD timing, charting, prenatals, supplements, etc.): BBT, OPK, prenatals + supplements, fertility yoga

Trying anything new this month? Trying to convince my gyno to get me started with some fertility testing..

Link to your chart if charting: 

Treatment Plan (if any): Nothing yet; hopefully I can start to get some answers about why we haven’t been able to get pregnant again.  I have been checked out (by TV-ultrasound) after the MC/D&E, and there is no sign of scarring or anything abnormal there.

For fun: New Year resolutions: Stressing less

Post # 15
Member
1881 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

View original reply
stellate23 :  why wouldn’t they be willing to do a circlage? Is there risk to it? I’m sorry you’re still trying so long after a MC too. Its getting harder and harder to deal with the MC the longer it takes to get pregnant again 

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