(Closed) jealous of my sister who is also encore

posted 9 years ago in Encore
Post # 3
Member
2344 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

I’m really sorry!! ((hugs)) This is definitely not fair of your family. When there is more than one wedding in a family, this often happens, and I know it has to be so upsetting and disappointing. I do agree with you that more attention will "swing" toward your special day after your sister’s has come and gone, but watching her get all the fanfare is still frustrating, I’m sure. Could you talk to your mom about it? While of course you will be the bigger person about it, and share in celebrating your sister, it could help to share your concerns with someone in your family who would be sympathetic.

Post # 4
Member
578 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: December 1969

Aww. Hang in there. I can only imagin how hard this must be but I am sure like stated before that after hers that things will come your way. I would try to talk to my mother about it and maybe she can help also! Hang in there!

Post # 5
Member
14186 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2009

Oh, i’m sorry, this sounds really hard. I bet that they’re going "one at a time!" and once your sister’s wedding is over, the attention will turn on yours. 3 months between weddings is plenty for there to be a lot of parties in your honor.  I’d mention it to your mom, though, so that she ensures there is equal treatment. Nobody wants to feel slighted, especially in regards to their wedding.

Post # 6
Member
213 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2009

I’m sorry that you’re having to go through this.  I kind of felt this way about FI’s cousin who go married about 6 weeks before us.  Now that her wedding is over, everyone talks about ours now.  In fact, it’s a little nice that someone went right before mine, since I can learn from her mistakes.  Luckily, in your situation, you and your sister have a good amount of time between weddings – then people can start focusing on you anyway.  Just a side note – even if your sister wasn’t getting married, you probably wouldn’t have had any showers yet, it’s just a little early.

Post # 7
Member
7053 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: July 2010

I’m sorry you feel this way.  most likely it’s because they’re celebrating the fact your  sis has such newfound happiness after such devastation and heartache.  I know you went thru this also in your prior marriage and I’m sure when the focus is off the FIRST wedding it will shift back to you.

What I’ve learned is whenever I’ve felt this kind of situation, I just give more to the person at the center…ie, LOVE more and then it comes back 10fold! Just give nothing but love right now and it will be such a more positive thing!  I know your family loves you and wants you happy too!  It’s just that most people have a hard time focusing on more than one issue at a time.  That’s probably it.

I also think they’ll probably have your showers around the sept/oct time btw.  You’ve got enough time for several showers!

it’s funny.  Call it love, or doing what my Creator wishes me to do, or even good karma when you give love rather than angst or negative feelings and energy, but when faced with negative situations I always try this as a focus to get me through and amazingly after all is said and done, things are always fine.

Post # 8
Member
1104 posts
Bumble bee

I think you’ll find you get more attention once your sister’s day is over. I got engaged about 6 months before my sister’s wedding and felt similar to you for a while (it is first wedding for both of us). But once her wedding was over, the attention definitely shifted to mine. You just need to get through this one first, enjoy it and be happy for your sister, and then you’ll be feeling much better 🙂

Post # 9
Member
1037 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2010 - Carlouel Yacht Club

Aww *hugs* I am sorry that you have to feel that way! Like the others have been saying, I bet that the excitement will turn to you as soon as your sister’s wedding is over…but patience is always hard to come by…I would be impatient as well!

Post # 11
Member
5154 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: June 2010

I am sure that your family and friends are trying to just "go in order" but let your mom (or a family member you are close to) know and maybe it will help.

::::HUGS:::: 

Post # 12
Member
955 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2010

Awwww I’m sorry that you are feeling a little ignored, especially when you want to be excited about your wedding too. I’m sure you are right that the attention will swing your way once your sister’s wedding passes. On the up side, focusing your attention on helping her get ready for your wedding will make the time go by faster for your wedding. Hang in there and feel free to vent if you need to!!! We are all excited for you and would love to hear all of your wedding details as you are planning

Post # 13
Member
685 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

(((HUGS)))  Hang in there.  I’m sure (hopefully) things will change after your sister’s wedding. 

I know of a family where both daughters are getting married with only a few weeks between them.  While the family tried their best to ensure both sisters had their time in the limelight, it was simply too difficult and they gave the first wedding more attention so as "to go in order."  After wedding no. 1, the attention shifted completely to the next wedding.

Your turn will come…hang in there.

Post # 14
Member
7053 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: July 2010

Wishing you all the best!  We’re here to perk you up too!

Post # 15
Member
774 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: March 2010

Aww, I’m so sorry! Its no fun when you feel like no one cares about your wedding.

I do think more attention will be turned to your wedding once your sister’s wedding is done. I am sure it is no one’s intention to make you feel this way. Hers is just so close and people need a little recovery time in between, especially for things like showers.  You just go on planning your wedding and getting excited for your big day. If you need someone to share your joys and frustrations the hive is always here!

Post # 16
Member
169 posts
Blushing bee

you re just not as popular for wtev reason, ideally you should always space wedding 6 mos apart, AT LEAST so that each of you can get attn appropriately, I doubt after all this HOOPALA for your sisters, and urs being so close to the holidays that you ll get much of what she is, but do not fret this is supposed to be about you and your fiance… just focus on that

The topic ‘jealous of my sister who is also encore’ is closed to new replies.

Find Amazing Vendors