- 8 years ago
- Wedding: October 2010
Im fuming with jealousy today. Almost sad/hurt for no real reason. Yes its immature. bad. terrible. I know it… but today
I was at the jewelry store resizing my ring when I ran into my brother in law and his girlfriend of 3 years. they were looking for rings. They’re not engaged yet or don’t know when they’ll be. I conjure up a scenario of him proposing her in a romantic way when he’s ready with that ring in hand. He’ll pop the question with the ring, probably on some romantic evening. It took my man 8 years to ask on that weeknight that we were falling asleep. I keep hearing of those romantic on your knee proposals at a romantic location that everyone seems to have. I had none of it and almost wanted one but my man isn’t a natural romantic. exciting proposal is one that happens only once. Our moment is gone, not to be replicated again. Our wedding was also a civil ceremony on a weeknight so I can get to a docor the same week. I feel bad. I know I’m bad for feeling this way. hate to bring it up with hybby. Why do I feel this way?
Everything just seemed to happen out of circumstances. I moved in with him because my school was closer to his home. We married because I was paying ridiculously expensive fees for health insurance, and meds and I had a medical emergency that needed immediate care. We eloped at a courthouse so I can see a doctor ASAP. If those things didn’t happen. We would probably not have gone this route. During our year 3 we didn’t even mention rings.
Then I see my brother in law looking for engagement rings with his 3 year love and it really turned me green for no reason. Please, if you experienced anything similar, please tell me I’m not psycho for feeling this way. It seems to sting so much more when it’s family I’m comparing myself too. 🙁