(Closed) jealousy monster …

posted 5 years ago in Waiting
Post # 2
Member
2050 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: February 2016

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loveatthefinishline :  just because she says she wasn’t ready or wasn’t waiting doesn’t mean she wasn’t. I didn’t discuss whether I was ready with my friends because I felt it should stay between me and my partner. If marriage was brought up before we were engaged I would always smile and say “umm we’ll see what happens” when in reality we’d seriously discussed getting engaged and a timeline for about 18 months before actually getting engaged.

If you’ve had a chat with your partner and know a proposal will happen at some point, then relax. You’re right, you are on your own timeline. So if you’re going to get married at some point in the future, enjoy your days as a girlfriend because they are few in number and all being well you won’t go back to being a girlfriend again.

Post # 3
Member
126 posts
Blushing bee

Jealousy is a normal human emotion. It sounds like you have thought this through and you know you’re on your own timeline. It helps to acknowledge your feelings sometimes!

Post # 4
Member
10813 posts
Sugar Beekeeper

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loveatthefinishline :  

Actually I think what you are feeling is envy, jealousy  is more when you think something of yours is being taken away or secretly shared.

But  envy is normal too  and not as  corrosive as jealousy is. Bear in mind what a pp said, don’t overshare your dreams and desires outside of your own  relationship in too much detail . Be a little mysterious.  Fake it till you make it .

Post # 5
Member
1356 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2018

I identify wholeheartedly with this but be assured your time will come and distract yourself until then.

Post # 6
Member
1042 posts
Bumble bee

I don’t think I ever get jealous to the point that I get bitter inside, but I get where you’re coming from. I’m also a waiting bee and I see people getting engaged/married and think, gosh, how lucky they are. SO and I also have a timeline planned out, but still sometimes emotions aren’t always rational. Hang in there! Meanwhile, go drool over some ring or shoes pictures or something to make yourself feel better haha!

Post # 7
Member
188 posts
Blushing bee

I totally understand this!  It was really annoying over the holidays watching what seemed like everyone I know (not really, but felt like it) get engaged when I knew I wasn’t until this year. A close friend also got engaged during this time, and my first reaction was definitely jealousy, then feeling sorry for myself, then feeling bad that I was jealous instead of happy for her, then finally just being happy for her.  I also got have gotten a lot of questions from people recently about when I’m getting married, and I always shrug it off like “oh, I don’t know…” to try to throw them off. 🙂  Indulging my craziness on this website has really helped!

Post # 8
Member
233 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: City, State

I totally get this. One of my friends from high school just got engaged, and even though I’m happy for him, I’m envious haha. 

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