Post # 1
I’m Jewish but my Fiance is not. We are having a Jewish ceremony and I want my parents to stand under the Chuppah with us. Fiance does not think his parents will be comfortable standing under the chuppah as they are not Jewish. I don’t think they will mind, but who knows. I don’t know what we will do if they do not want to as I want mine up there. Suggestions?
Anyways, I’m mainly wondering how many people have their parents stand under the chuppah with them and how many don’t?
Post # 3
My parents will be standing under the chuppah with us as will finance’s mom (his dad passed away recently but if he were still alive, he would be there too )-:
My fiancé isn’t Jewish but he’s not anything, and neither is his mom so there’s not really an issue. He’s Korean and his mom will be wearing a hanbok so she will bring in some of Korean traditions next to the jewish ones (also, our ketubah will be in Korean, English and Hebrew). Can you tell your in laws that it’s about having them there next to you, and being surrounded by family as opposed to telliing them they have to stand under a chuppah? Not sure why a chuppah would make anyone uncomfortable as its trendy to get married under a canopy of some kind anyways these days, but maybe explaining it a different way would help them feel comfortable.
Post # 5
Our parents didn’t. We just thought they would enjoy the ceremony more sitting down and not having to stand for 30 minutes. Plus we didn’t want it all crowded up there.
For what it’s worth, I’m Jewish and Darling Husband is not.
Post # 7
My parents and his parents held the poles. I voted “no” because it wasn’t really “yes”
I’m Jewish, my husband is not.
Post # 8
- Wedding: June 2010 - New York Botanical Garden
Our chuppah was really only big enough for the two of us and the rabbi, and at times, a speaker, but our families stood up there with us basically under the chuppah but really on either side of us. It was wonderful having our families up there with us.
Post # 9
Both my Fiance and I are Jewish. My dad is getting hip surgery so he specifically told us he didn’t want to stand up for the service; that made our decision easy!!
Post # 10
My husband is Jewish. Our parents were supposed to stand under the huppah. Mine did, but my husband’s parents sort of partially stood under it, closer to the bridal party along the sides.
Why would his parents be uncomfortable standing under it? It’s not like you have to renounce Jesus to stand under it 🙂
Post # 11
The reason they stand all under is to represent the families being joined. Although the chuppah is at nearly every Jewish wedding, it is actually a tradition and cultural…not religious, so if that is a concern to the in-laws perhaps explaining it a bit more will help.
Post # 12
We’ve been to one Jewish wedding and both sets of parents stood under with the bride/groom for the duration of the ceremony.
Post # 13
At my second wedding, none of the parents were present. However, at my first wedding, both sets of parents were under the chuppah. Mine (who are not Jewish) actually appreciated the custom more than the groom’s parents did.
Post # 14
We all stood under the chuppah together. My parents are Jewish, but his are not. They actually really liked being so involved:
PS we made our chuppah out of a coverlet my great grandmother made. I guess it wasn’t very traditional, but we also did not have a traditional Jewish wedding.