- 6 years ago
- Wedding: February 2012
I graduated last May and when Fiance and I relocated, I planned to apply at temp agencies. And the manager at my current job gave me a number for a radio station to call because she put a good word in for me.
I’ve been procrastinating on all of it, mostly out of anxiety and self consciousness. I just don’t feel qualified to do anything except wait tables. I have limited experience and really, no network, and finding a job is already hard enough for people who have both of those things.
Also, the radio station lady that my manager recommended saw Fiance and I by chance at the mall a couple of weeks ago and began questioning me immediately. Was totally unprepared for it and it basically amounted to “So, you graduated recently? Well, what have you been doing since then? Oh, not much. Hm. Have you actually had any professional writing experience? No? Oh. Well, here, call this number and maybe you can have an interview but we don’t actually need people right now” I mentally beat myself up over that disaster the entire car ride home and most of the next day, too.
I’ve decided that I have to start trying next week, regardless. I just feel scared and I have no idea what I’m doing and everyone offers different advice – call, don’t call, Ask for the manager, don’t ask for the manager, you need this, you don’t need that. Gah! I actually like my job waiting tables but realistically, I can’t do that forever and it doesn’t offer security or benefits so I have to think of the long term.
My dad is trying to motivate me by reminding me of everything I accomplished by myself with little to no help – got my first job on my own, got the first college degree out of my family, and paid for it myself with no debt, got my own apartment by myself, overcame social anxiety disorder (mostly). I hate to tell him a lot of things I did by myself because I had no choice. I’ve never been good at connecting with people so I simply didn’t have anyone to rely on. And it’s just getting harder because each new step requires more and more networking skills.