(Closed) Job wont approve honeymoon off….what do i do?

posted 4 years ago in Honeymoons
Post # 61
1412 posts
Bumble bee

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peridot456:  “I get it, it sounds like you were clear about your wedding from the start and they misled you.”

Yes, OP mentioned her wedding and her new boss said they’d work on it. BUT it sounds like the boss wasn’t aware that those days would fall AFTER her hire date. If I was her boss, and she had this request, I wouldn’t think to ask about a hire date since it’s the employees job to track/manage their vacation. If she’d been at the company 6 years, I would infer that she was aware of the vacation/leave policies. 

Unfortunatley, OP picked her date and then switched jobs. Her new boss isn’t responsible for her inaccurate planning. 

OP- it sucks that this happened. But probably best to try and work with them. The fact that you work somewhere in the US that allows you 3 weeks of leave annually is rare! Don’t throw away a 6 year job without exploring every option. 

Post # 62
2968 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

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Kslim13:  See if you can go back to your old position/department or start looking for something now- you have time!. Be up front with your new potential employers about requiring the time off for your wedding/honeymoon that is something you already have planned and take it unpaid if they won’t give you PTO.

Post # 63
6524 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: September 2013

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Kslim13:  unless you are DIY’g a lot of things I don’t see why you need to take off an entire week before your wedding. My wedding was on a Saturday night and I took off on Friday, that was it.

I would speak directly to your boss, and if he/she says no, than I would give my 2 weeks. Then when you come back, I would use that time to look for a better job.

Post # 64
697 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

Three weeks is an insane amount of time to take off for a wedding. 

Post # 65
1482 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2015

Haha, wow, culture shock!! I am amazed at the way this thread has turned out. Not at all what I expected from reading the headline.

Ok, granted I’m in Europe, but I took two weeks off for my wedding and I didn’t even go on a proper honeymoon! I live in the UK but got married in my home country, so I took the week before the wedding off to finalise all the details with the priest/church, venue/caterers, stylist, photographer etc. I then also took the week after the wedding off to spend some time in my country with DH’s family members who had travelled over for the wedding. (FYI – in my job I get 28 days holiday per year, and though it is very limited when I can take my holiday, I would still be able to take 3 weeks off during summer).

OP, I’m sorry I’m not bringing much to the table other than telling you what a sh*tty situation you’re in, but I don’t know what to say! Unless you really dislike your job I wouldn’t recommend that you quit, but I do definitely think that the HR and boss route is the way to go. Explain to them that you have worked for this company for 6 years, and that you were not planning on changing job so close to your wedding. Also say that you were clear in disclosing from the beginning when your wedding was and how much time you needed off, and that you decided to go ahead with the transfer because you were told it would not be a problem. 

Above all I wish you luck! This is not something you should have to stress out over when you have a wedding to plan!!

Post # 66
309 posts
Helper bee

What state are you in? Have you looked into the labor laws?  It is actually illegal in many states to have a use it or lose it policy and many companies do it anyway. Check your labor board. My company highly encourages you to use it and will push vacation time on you… but legally cannot force you to do it.

Post # 68
120 posts
Blushing bee

Bye, Felisha. I’d be gone before you could say “two weeks”, as long as Darling Husband was on board, of course. Nothing would have stood in the way of my wedding or honeymoon, especially not a job I don’t even like. It sounds like your Fiance is on board, so why don’t you quit, enjoy the time you have off, and then start looking for a new job once the honeymoon is over?

Post # 69
2896 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: April 2017

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Kslim13:  I guess you kind of learned the hard way that you need to have the approval for any kind of extended time off in writing.  A boss saying that you guys will work things out doesn’t cut it legally.

I don’t know if I would be willing to throw a 6 year employment history out the window for this, especially if I liked the company.  But like a PP said, you have to decide which is more important, the employment history, or being able to take the time off when you want to.

There were quite a few people at my old company that would want to take 3 weeks or more off in the middle of summer (our busiest time of year) so they could go overseas because that’s when their kids were out of school.  Our management put their collective feet down and would not approve more than 2 weeks at a time.  I understand a wedding is (supposed to be) a once in a lifetime thing, but it’s more rare for companies to allow that much time off at once.  So, if you do decide to look elsewhere, just understand you may meet a lot of resistance.  I found when I was job hunting recently, a few places I interviewed with had policies where you couldn’t take time off (except for emergencies) for the first 6 months – paid or unpaid.  While you earn vacation time, it is still up to the discretion of the employeer on when you can take it and how much at a time.  While it sucks in instances like this, it is what it is.

I would talk to your boss one last time.  Kiss his ass a bit if you have to.  You don’t need an entire week off before the wedding – all my friends took one or two days off most.

Post # 70
1210 posts
Bumble bee

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Kslim13:  I would try talking with your boss (again). My honeymoon in December was cancelled due to a hurricane, and I lost my 2 weeks of vacation at the end of the year. I called HR and they stated that was the company’s policy but I could work something out with my manager.

Thankfully, my manager allowed me to carryover the 2 weeks into January which is when we were able to reschedule the trip. It was against the “official policy”, but HR really didn’t want anything to do with it in the end.

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