Jobs and TTC – should I stay or go

posted 2 years ago in TTC
Post # 2
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9189 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper

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mcmeow :  take the new job if you get it. The commute alone will make it worth it plus it sounds like you’ll have more opportunity and job satisfaction there. You aren’t pregnant yet so you can spend the next year proving that you kick-ass and that they’d be stupid not to hold your job. 

Post # 4
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419 posts
Helper bee

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mcmeow :  The new job sounds like a great oportunity!  I think you should definitely apply! Is it possible to find out their policy regarding mat leave prior to taking the job? Since you aren’t currently pregnant I don’t think it makes sense to hold back and stay in a job that doesn’t have room for growth, but at the same time I understand that job security is important. I never realized what it’s like in the US before reading these boards; I’m Canadian and took it for granted that people always have jobs to go back to after taking a break of up to a year to have a baby.

Post # 5
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9189 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper

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mcmeow :  I have always worked for small firms and in my personal experience they are very willing to work with an exceptional employee to make maternity leave work. I requested an extended leave and one of the partners said “I’m pushing with my other partners to get you want you need. I don’t really want you gone for an extra couple months but I know that the alternative is to risk losing you forever and I definitely don’t want that”. It meant a lot to me that the effort and skill I bring to my career was recognized and appreciated it.  Plus replacing employees is expensive! 

Proximity is important when you have kids. First off less commuting = more time with baby each day. And when daycare calls and says you have to pick your sick kid being an hour away is tough. 

Also you haven’t even started trying yet. You’ll kick yourself if you stay in a job you hate only to have trouble conceiving. I switched to this job 8 months into ttc and it took me two years to get pregnant. I still had PLENTY of time to prove myself here. And I know my old firm would never have been so accomodating of extended leave. It was a risk, but it paid off in the end. 

Post # 7
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9189 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper

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mcmeow :  my commute is between 45-1 hr and it does add up. I try to make the best use of that time (I take public transit so I can read, make calls, handle email, etc at least) but it’s not ideal. It’s fine while she’s in daycare, but once she’s in elementary school I’m going to be looking for something closer or part time or telecommuting because I don’t want to miss things and deal with having babysitters shuffle her around in the afternoons. 

Post # 8
Member
2312 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: March 2019

Part of your job offer will be (or should be) an explaniation of benefits. If they don’t provide one, ask for one. Each time I have gotten a job offer, I usually have a half hour meeting with HR to explain all the benefits before they hand me the actual offer. They will have an explaniation of the mat leave policy in there, if not you could ask for it. Usually you have to have been there a year, but most companies will work with you if you do a good job. I know we hired an engineer that was pregnant and gave her the full benefits package because she was a great prospect. And she has done an awesome job, so it was no skin off our backs! 

Post # 10
Member
9189 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper

That assumes there is HR! Every small firm I’ve worked for told me salary, 401k, insurance, and PTO with the offer, but the rest of the benefits were always explained after I started. But then again only 1 job ever had an HR department and it was awful lol. 

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