(Closed) Join Our Club…Or Else!

posted 4 years ago in Babies
Post # 2
2515 posts
Sugar bee

beachbride1216:  Maybe just change the subject to something else going on in your life?

“Are you trying for a baby?”

“No, but FI and I are planning a cruise in December!”

Post # 3
1685 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

Best response I’ve heard, “We’re just practicing”

Post # 4
1728 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: March 1998

I took 10 cycles to get pregnant, so kudos to you on doing what we also chose: not telling a damn person that we were trying.

I just lied and told people we were never having kids (with a big emphasis on ‘NEVER’ — I find that’s such a forboding word that most people won’t pry further. If they continue to ask, a, “I don’t want to talk about it,” should do the trick). When a random relative would bring it up (usually an in-law talking to MIL, hinting about us having kids), we would just sit in silence or change the subject. It worked — after a few times, people started shutting up. By the time they found out I was pregnant, my in-laws were convinced that we were never having kids.

You give them anything to work with, and if they’re nosy enough to ask question a, they’ll continue asking more if they sense that you’re at all comfortable with it. My “never” and implied fertility issues (which…for 10 perfectly timed cycles, and knowing what we know now, we likely did have them) worked like a charm.


Post # 5
1031 posts
Bumble bee

I used to have. Lot of these:

“as soon as they make a good tasting non alcoholic wine that still gets me buzzed”

“waiting X years is the standard in our family”

“we are still mourning the passing of our plant/pet rock”

“honestly, all I want is a puppy!!”

“when prices drop on the black market we will pick some up”

“I checked out Costco, too expensive”

just look at your shoes and start crying.

my favourite “and how is your sex life? Because that is what you just asked me” this one could be especially good since new moms are asking you. You could also ask them if they sex lives have fully recovered yet. 

Post # 6
9556 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2013

PoppyH:  I love “we are still mourning the passing of our plant/pet rock”<br /><br /><br />

Post # 7
1115 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 2013

PoppyH:  I love the “how’s your sex life?” One. I’ve also heard “do you/does your wife spit or swallow?”. Or “no sorry we’re not having unprotected sex but when we do decide that my husband can ejaculate inside me without a condom you’ll be the first to know!”

i personally tell people it’s none of their business Or that it’s between DH, my doctor and myself. If I’m feeling really snarky I’ll say when it’s legal to crate kids and leave them all day like we do with our dogs or something to that effect.

Post # 8
917 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

You read my mind!  The “are you pregnant” question drives me crazy.  Yes, I would absolutely love to be pregnant and have way more children than most of the people asking, but no, I’m currently not.  Nor am I going to inform anyone other than my mother that we plan to try because I don’t want the dreaded “yet” added onto the question.  At least people mean well…but I still want to give very direct, opinionated, and socially unacceptable answers.  

Maybe next time I’ll try the pet rock idea!  😀

Post # 9
9257 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2013 - Rocky Mountains USA

Annoying, but most people just mean well and are trying to connect or whatever.  (Although definitely tacky to ask about whether you’re currently TRYING.  Really, does anybody need to know those details?!  Nobody’s asked me that – we just get “Are you guys thinking about having kids anytime soon?” etc)  

I say “We’re just enjoying being the two of us for now.”

Post # 10
2895 posts
Sugar bee

”Unfortunately, I can’t have kids (right now) … I have sooooo many breakable objects in my house.”



Post # 11
2609 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

beachbride1216:  How about, “Why do you ask?” 

Or, “I guess it’s true what they say, misery really does love company.” 

Its such a rude, nosy question. 

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